my life

2010-06-11T11:10:00.003+08:00

Whoaaa its been so long since my last post.... Well no one ever read this shit so there's no need for me to update -_- Anyway lets begin with my beloved Arsenal. We manage to hang on to 3rd spot in the league. Had a few moments which i dont want to go in detail. Yeah yeah we lost to Sp*rs and they came out with a DVD of that game the very next day... Irritating much! When was the last time they won the league?? Even before i was born -___- But at least we finish above them and so we celebrated St Totteringham day :D hahaa... After the season ended, we got Chamakh.. Gosh i really hope he will provide us with some strength next season. Cant wait to see what he's capable of doing... Rumours of Cesc leaving for Barca is at its peak, again! Every season the same damn story but i guess this year it's beginning to sound more serious.. Anyways i'll only believe it when he really goes there (Hope not!)

The World Cup is around the corner baby!!! Well actually it starts today.. So sick of these fake footie fans who keeps getting excited about the teams.. Most of them just wants to see all the hot dudes and not really watching the game -_-' I dont hear them speaking footie otuside of World Cup. Makes me sick! Anyways i'll be watching South Africa vs Mexico tonight on.... TV1! Aahhh so lame!! Since we dont have Astro in this shitty apartment, i have to resort to normal channels.. Damnit! All those so-called "fans" will be able to watch all the games on Astro and i can only watch selected games!! Not fair!! Anyways, since Arsenal player Carlos Vela will be playing tonight i'm hoping he'll score some goals :) but my ultimate team to win the World Cup is Holland aka Oranje!! Cos me favourite (probably most loyal) player is in it Mr van Persieee.... Holland totally deserve to win. I just hope no more injuries to RvP pleaseeeee.... We need you for next season!! It was so good to see him play in the last few games of last season... Wonder what might have happen if he didnt get injured *Sigh*

Well another 6 months to go!! I mean i'm moving back to Melaka at the end of this year!! Cant wait!! I've already brought back some of the stuff which i dont use to my home.. Still have not thought of the ultimate excuse (reason) to resign from this god-forsaken job! I'm sure Ms Bitch will ask a lot of questions so i need to be prepared and not st..st.. stutter :D Well i have another 6 months to think ze perfecto answer....

Tigger came to see me last week!! XD I had a great time with him... Have not seen him for 2 months before this... He said the whole family will be moving to Rawang this month or next month!! Yes i'm happy but Rawang is not exactly near to my place -_- so i wonder how often we'll get to see each other that time. He is going to have to get a new job so i'm not sure what's gonna happen in the next few months.. I thought this business will be the ultimate thing for him but then he has a different plan now.... Whatever it is i hope everything will go well for him. I'm not the type who can change my mind once i'm already onto something but different people have different views on life and plans so who am i to say anything...

Things in the apartment are doing ok... Just bored that XY already went back to Taiping for her training :( She'll only be back in Sept or Oct.. By that time, i will have just another 2-3 months to spend with her.... My roomie got a hamster last week and i dont like it cos it stinks the hall! And she is sad that the hamster doesnt wanna play with her -_-'' Mike my other housemate is ok.. Well as long as he dont kacau me then i'm ok :P Just that i cant believe when he told me the fixing of the new lock costs RM74!!! Really cant believe it!! Anyways i just need to tahan staying here for another 6 months and then i'm FREEEEEEE!!!! xD

Bye for now! Not sure when i'm writing another psot though -_- haha!!

2010-04-13T11:55:00.002+08:00

Whoaa its been so long since my last post.. No one reads it anyways so there's no need for me to worry whether people are waiting for my next post -_- haha... Anyways, the Barca game came and went.. 1st leg was awesome! We were 2-o down and then went on to level with them.. Truly one of the biggest comeback this season. Watching Thierry Henry play against us were.. ummm unusual?!... hehe.. But he got a great reception by the Arsenal fans.. Truly amazing.. And at the end of the game, when all the players had gone into the dressing room, he was still at the pitch, cheering the arsenal fans... Oooohhh it was an emotional moment :') 2nd leg was a disappointment.. We scored the 1st goal but then Barca went on to smack us 3-1. But it was a relief because we had sooooo many injury problems that letting go of CL was the best thing to do... I think we would have struggled against inter and all the other european teams.. Anyhoos, we will be travelling to Spurs tomorrow and the good news is Robin van Persie MIGHT play.... Ohhhh it's been so long Robin... Too long.... But i hope he's benched and only come on during the 2nd half if we're trailing cos i really dont want his injury to come back if he were to play full time.. It will be a nice feeling to see him again tomorrow... I do hope we trash Spurs.. They have injury problems too and they played for 2 hours last Sunday during the fa cup semi against Portsmouth so they might be a little bit tired.. And might i add that they lost against the problematic Pompey and the fa final will be Chelsea v Portsmouth!! I'm so happy for Pompey because they totally deserve it.. Too many internal problems and with relegation, they still go on to fight.... Well done!!

Be back soon! :)

2010-03-25T10:06:00.003+08:00

So Arsenal appealed to the FA with regards to the Vermaelen's red. Apparently it was an "obvious goal-scoring opportunity".. Geezzzz. -_____- I still think it doesnt warrant a red. Yellow, MAYBE.... But a red with a penalty is just too much... Anyhoos, as everyone suspected, the appeal was dismissed but good news is he's only banned for the Birmingham game.. Phewww... Many predicted that the appeal will be dismissed AND probably add another game but luckily that did not happen as it was not a frivalous appeal... Now with this situation, it means that either Sol will be paired up with Silvestre (!!!) or Song with Silvestre (!!! again).. With Gallas out with injury, Tommy V for suspension, and Sol (maybe) rested for Barca, Arsene's choice might show which he would prefer, CL or PL cos if he rests Sol that probably means that CL is more important to him. I like the idea of Song over there to cover in defense since he showed GREAT defending skills during WHU. I'm a lil worried over Silvestre though. To me, he hasnt prove himself to be in the first team and i just hope that he will do his best for Birmingham.

Other than that, there are really not much in the news which is so boring for me.. There's nothing i would want than to read news bout my team. Of course, shitty news created by unprofessional journalism is not counted like the recent AA23 "news". Made me sick to my stomach that someone wants to create something outta nothing especially at these times when we should be focusing on every game. It was reported that AA23 told press that we wont win the title this year because we still havent bought any star players.. It was then discovered that this interview was 1 year ago and he didnt really say that we wont win the title... Anyway malas la i wanna talk about it.. Melemahkan semangat only...

Nothing else interesting really happening in my life.. Wake up early, go to work, come back, cook dinner, then sleep. That's my life everyday. Oh yeah sice my laptop is sent for repair, i'll come to office to watch the game. Ooooopssss sorry boss... No choice la...

Red, Titi and Water!!

2010-03-23T13:54:00.003+08:00

Tigger came last Saturday at about 2pm -_- We went to Sunway Pyramid and then went to find a hotel nearby. We wanted to watch Alice in Wonderland but all tickets were sold out! Boooo.... So we just hang out, have dinner and went back to sleep. He promised that we could go to a nearby mamak to watch the Arsenal v WHU game at 1.30am so we woke up at 1am, wash up and go find a mamak.. By the time we arrived to a suitable mamak, it was already about 10 minutes into the game and we were leading 1-0!! Goal by Denilson... I hope with this goal, he will find confidence when palying and will improve himself more.. This game marked the return of our Captain Fab-tastic!! The game was quite exciting during the 1st with a few decent chances but we just couldnt find more goals.. Then just before the half time, my Thomas Vermaelen was sent off for "denying a goal-scoring opportunity" -_____- It was a foul which warrant a red card. His eyes were on the ball and that wasnt even a harsh "tackle"... So WHU were given a penalty and it was Diamanti who took it. And jeng jeng jenggggggg Almunia went to the right was and managed to push the ball out!!! That was really a great save from him... Gosh i take back everything i've ever said about Almunia bout him being a bad keeper.. I'll happily eat a humble pie now :D Later i found out that the reason why he wasnt at his best level earlier in the season was because his mother in law had passed away and he just wasnt himself.... Feel so sad but right now he's at a good form.. Second half came and we tried as much to score but no luck. WHU had a few decent chances despite us being down to 10 men but they also couldnt score. Then about 10 minutes before the game ended, WHU handled the ball in the penalty box and so it was a penalty!! Phewww luckily Cesc managed to score and killed the game :) All in all it was an exciting game and Song really did a good job defending... With Vermaelen maybe out for Birmingham, I dont mind having Song to replace him... Such a versatile player and he was man of the match!! The reason why i said maybe out for Birmingham was because the Gunners have appealed to the FA for the red card and FA will hear the appeal today. I'm so nervous.... I hope FA overturn the suspension because we really need him.. I'm scared to even imagine Silvestre in the next game because truth be told, he's not at his best level now. And Wenger might rest Sol for the Barca game next week so emmmmm.... Aaaahhh i dont wanna think about it!!! Speaking of Barca, Thierry Henry said in an interview that everytime there's a CL draw, he'll be in pain because he doesnt want to face Arsenal. The amount of love he has for this team makes me wanna cry... He is a true Gooner... And he said he will NEVER EVER celebrate if they score against us... Awwww.... then dont score Titi :P

Ok enough of update on my beloved team. Move on to Sunday, we went to Sunway Lagoon and had sooooooooooooo muuucchhhhh fun there.... We tried so many water rides together and some were scary ones but as long as i'm with him, i feel safe <3 Cant believe time passed by sooooo freaking fast and the next thing i know, it's time for me to say goodbye to him :'( It was painful but i had to let him go back home.... I hope we get to do this again... I really love him to death....

CHAMPIONS LEAGUE DRAW!!!!!!!

2010-03-19T21:10:00.002+08:00

Okay lets go straight to the point. The Champions League draw which was held about 2 hours ago. Guess who we are ermmm drawn??????? BARCELONA!!!!!!!!!!! Perasoanlly i was hoping for CSKA Moscow and then we can go on to tougher ones and maybe final would either be Barca or ManU but to be drawn so early against them is just so shocking!!! But kinda good in a way because if we were able to beat Barca, then we actually could easily cruise into the final and eventually become champion!!! And if we could beat Barca, that could at least shut all the other teams and people who look down on us and write us off for like 10 million times!!! That got me a lil excited :D SO i dont know whether i could have sound sleep from now till March 31st :P So we will play home first which means Thierry Henry is coming homeeeeee.... I BELIEVE THIS TEAM COULD DO IT. If we could win CL and BPL, oh my freaking god!!!!!! that'll be like the best thing everrrrrr.... We totally deserve it!!! Hope Robin van Persie can make it for the away against Barca. even if he cant make it, i'm sure we have sufficient players to win this... Come one Gunnerssss.... Bring on Barca!!!!!!! Let's beat the world's best and we can overtake to be the world's best. OMG i'm all excited again!!!!! Byeeeeee....

Dramaaa

2010-03-18T08:45:00.002+08:00

Sorry for the late post. Been busy. Hahaha...... Anyways, first up, Hull City v Arsenal. It was a game full of drama and it really gave me a heart attack until the final whistle.... Ok Arshavin netted the first goal. It was a good goal as he dribble past 2 defenders and netted the ball. It was one of his best goals. Superb!!!! After that, Hull got a penalty which was not supposed to be given as the player was fucking offside and Sol even got a yellow for bringing him down -_- There was nothing much Almunia could do although he went the right way but the ball went in. I wouldnt blame him though.... The drama came when Boateng seemed to poke Bendtner's eye for god knows what reason. And Bendtner also got a yellow WTF??? Anyways after that Boateng tackled Sagna and it was a career threatening challenge as his boots was at his knee!!! Of course he was given a second yellow and that resulted in red. Reports later came out that there were stud marks on Sagna's knee.... Ugghhh people just dont learn anything from the Ramsey incident!!!! Its really lucky that Sagna was okay... Anyways, Theo came on and he really created many chances but sadly none were finished. But it was clear that Theo was like a breathe of fresh air.. Hull players were clearly too slow for him... Hehehehe... Anyways we tried to score but nothing came out until it was the 90th minute and right then i started to panic. We cant go away with a draw.. We need the 3 full pointssss!!!!!! And then there were like 6 minutes of stoppage time and that i think was the time that the players realised that we NEED another goal.. And at the 4th stoppage minute, Denilson kicked the ball from a long range which looked like a desperate last attempt and it went straight to GK but unfortunately GK just parried it back to the danger zone when he could have saved it and off the ball went towards Bendtner and of course he made damn sure that he net the winner!!! :D :D :D Phewwwww that was a relieffff.... I really appreciated Denilson's shot although i've always thought he was lazy at times and looked like he was jogging all the time... But for this game, he was decent.. He tried to get back his ball whenever he lossed it. So credit to him.. Of course credit to Bendtner and Arshavin. We worked really hard until the last minute and that showed our determination and like Arsene said we have mental strength and desire to win the league... Vermaelen was good as usual :D He was really the signing of the season!! Sol was good for someone his age to play the 2nd game of the week. He provides experience and gave some boost to the young players. Clichy is really becoming my next favourite. He's looking like how he is few years back. Nasri was ok.. Wasnt as good as during the Porto game and Hull players read his game quite well.. But of course you cant expect him to start doing what he did against Porto immediately for every single game. All in all, almost every player were good. Almunia also had a good game trying to punch out ball and catch it every time he has a chance to do so... The penalty was not his fault... Of course this game missed players like Cesc, Rosicky and Song and i heard all of them might be back for this Saturday's game against West Ham... Ohhh i'm so excited we have only 8 games to go..... Not very easy run-in but i think we can do it. Finally....

ManUtd will play against Liverpool and although Liv have not been good lately, i really hope they'll trash ManUtd. They would really do us a favour :D

Tigger's coming this Saturday :D He's gonna spend a night in KL. He said he's gonna bring me to Sunway Lagoon, do some shopping :D and just hang out. I asked him to teman me to watch Ars v WHU at 1am but he said not sure -_-''

Thats all about it. Byeeeee peepssss..... Arsenal For Life!!!

All's good now :D

2010-03-13T17:37:00.002+08:00

So a little update about my life. Tigger and me are okay now :D I was glad that he texted me that evening. I missed him so much. So we promised each other some stuff and then life is back to normal. Errrmmm actually not really back to normal. Work sucked big time. The only good thing is ze boss asked me whether i wanna be a director of a big company for a few months while they search for a permanent director. Told her i'd think about it. I'll definitely get some money. On to my fucking apartment. Of course nothing good ever happen in that shithole. Internet has not been working since yesterday, my laptop crashed for no fucking reason and now (Saturday 5.45pm) i'm at my office. Of course not for work. There's aircond here and internet so i thought i could spend a night here cos it's so fucking hot in my apartment. Might try to see whether i could watch Hull v Arsenal tonight through live streaming. Actually i feel kinda pathetic to come to this level. No friends and i dont have anything to do. Can i survive another 9 months here?? I'm not too sure. Can or not, i still have to push myself to go on. Apart from that, nothing interesting is happening in my life.

So as i said earlier, Hull v Arsenal tonight. VERY nervous. No room for errors for us. Tonight we will be without Cesc, Gallas, Song, MAYBE Sagna and MAYBE Sol. But i'm pretty sure we could win this game. Nasri had shown fantastic performance in Cesc's position during the Porto game. Plus we still have Eboue, Bendtner, Andrey, VERMAELEN!! :D And i think Clichy has been improving in an unbelievable manner. So i'm very confident in this team. After this we only have another 8 games to go!!!! OOOOOOOHHHHHH i'm freaking excited!!!!! It's time for us to hold a silverware for BOTH CL and PL!!!!!!!! Anyways, i'm gonna end now. Dont know what am i gonna do now in the office. Maybe watch some videos or WORK!! Hahaha the horror!!!! Byeeeeee....

2010-03-10T13:27:00.002+08:00

I'm suffering now without my Tigger. All morning all i thought was him. Not even Arsenal's 5-0 can make me happy. Not even after watching the goals for a millionth time :'( I gotta make my decision fast and right now, all i can think is that i gotta let him go. I dont wanna further torture him with all my ridiculous demands and attitude anymore. I dont want to be the person who is gonna block his future. I know his future is not with me. He belongs with someone who can make him happy all the time. Someone who can care for him and be with him no matter what. Someone who knows what to do when facing fucked up situations like this. And i know that someone is not me. It will never be me. All i think about is myself. Maybe "some" people are right. I dont deserve him. I dont deserve to be with anybody because of my character. He might think that i dont love him anymore but i actually just dont want to make him suffer anymore. I do love him. I love him very much. More than anything in this world. But sometimes we just take for granted many things and this is one of it :'(

Arsenal 5 FC Porto 0 !!!!

2010-03-10T10:40:00.001+08:00

I didnt watch the game as it was 3.45 am but there were sooooo many things to talk about in this superb game. First up, we were without Captain Cesc and William Gallas and many thought we would be lost without him. Little did they know that we would be fine without him :D The result provided a lot of firsts. This was Nicklas Bendtner's first hat trick in his career. This was the first time Arsenal has overturned a first leg deficit in 30 freaking years!!! Arsenal are the first team to ever put 5 past Porto in Champions League. First time in this season that Arsenal managed to score in the first 15 minutes. First time Arsenal had a hat trick in this season. Last season was Arshavin v Liverpool.

There were too many Man of the Match for this game. First up, Arshavin didnt look like he was too selfish as he assisted in a couple of goals. I am soooo proud of him. I thought he was being selfish and wasted too many chances in his past previous games. But what a changed player is he now :D Nasri took on 3 defenders before putting in a low attempt on goal. It was really beautiful. Almost Dennis Bergkamp-like :D He is becoming my favourite player next to Rosicky and Vermaelen. Eboue finally scored the 4th goal assisted by Arshavin. Eboue then was taken down in the box during injury time and penalty was given and Bendtner was to take it. That was a great way to end the game. Now we'll be in the quarter finals and i actually think we can win a Double this season.. Woooohooooooooooo that got me all excited!!! :D Bendtner did a GREAT job especially after missing 10 million chances during Burnley. He actually paid his debt together with interest!! Hehehe.. Heard Vermaelen and Campbell did a great job defending. I actually like the pairing and they seem to work well together. In fact Vermaelen works well with anyone i guess :D

So far, no news from Tigger. I miss him. I wanna call him but i guess the pride in me wont let me do it. I wonder how is he now. Is he still sick? Or has he gotten better???

100th post :(

2010-03-09T21:16:00.002+08:00

This is my 100th post and so far NOTHING's been great in my life. Decided to take a little break from Tigger and then see how things go. I have not been in contact with him ever since he agreed to give me some space. Truthfully, i dont wanna do this to him but i think i have to in order to evaluate our relationship. Is it worth continuing or should i just completely end it to avoid hurting him even more???? Am i the person he really love?? Will i be able to completely forget about the past if i were to get back with him?? Right now, it's all QUESTIONS QUESTIONS AND MORE QUESTIONS.. I really dont know what to do.. I have no one to talk to, no one to lend their shoulder for me to cry on.. Nothing!! Before we ended things this afternoon, he did say that he was not feeling well.. I hope he's okay now. I really wanna ask how is he doing but i just dont have the courage to text him.. Good god why am i being such a coward bitch?? Just take the bloody phone and text or call!!! Is that soo fucking difficult?? I guess i really am a coward bitch. A bitch who doesnt care about anyone's feelings but her own. A bitch who thinks the world against her. A bitch who just cant be happy with things that she already has :'( :'( :'( The fact is i really do miss him.. I miss him like fucking crazy.. Is this the end of everything? Where do i start from here???

P/S: Arsenal v Porto in the early morning. I hope we win even though we'll be without Cesc. At least give me something to be happy about.

SHIT!!

2010-03-09T10:17:00.002+08:00

Shit! I think i made a mistake with a client. Was supposed to ask her to pass back the Annual Return AND the signing pages for financial statement but when she called yesterday, i told her to pass back only the Annual Return!!!! Of course i forgot because normally we dont send the financial statements to client, this is Ling's job!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!

On a different note, Arsenal will be going against Porto in the Champions League last-16 tie and we will be without Cesc this time as he is suffering from a hamstring problem. I think we'll do just fine without him. Guess Wenger thought it will be a huge gamble to play him for today's game as it might aggravate his injury and he would then be out for a longer time. he wont be out for too long so i guess it's quite a relief. Hope Walcott-Bendtner-Diaby trio will give us some strength and REALLY hope Bendtner learn something from the match against Burnley. NO MORE MISSED CHANCES!! William Gallas is out (AGAIN!!) He was supposed to be fit for Porto but then he went "back to square one" when he got injured again during training while jogging!! Hope he'll be ok but not too sure how long he'll be out again. Heard it's ONE MONTH!!!! Good god, whats with Arsenal and all their injuries??????!!!!! ANd please dont say it's cos we're a young team and our players and "soft" cos Gallas is 32 (i think) and van Persie is 26/27. Ooooohhhh speaking of van Persie, there were rumours saying that he'll be back in a matter of weeks!!!!!! Gosh i got sooooooo freaking super excited when i heard this. The down side to it is that he's always slow to get back to his good side after recovering from injuries sooo.... hmmmmm... I just hope he'll be back for at least the last few matches and just really fire us to the top and hopefully champions this season :D :D :D This might just be our season!!!!! Can you sense my excitement??? Hehehehe..... I really hope we are champions this season. We've gone through shit and we deserve to be champions more than any other team. We were written off for god knows how many times and the injuries list seems no end to it.. We really deserve it.. We were the team with NO controversies compared to Chelsea or Liv or ManCity.. It's time for us to lift the precious trophy after a 5-year drought.. WE ARE GONNA BE CHAMPIONS THIS SEASON 2009/2010!!!!!!

On a not so good note, me and Tigger are getting from bad to worst. I really dont know what to say. I really dont know what to do or what to think. I went to sleep at 9.30pm last night for goodness sake!!! Cos i dont wanna think bout it.. It's really pathetic that i dont have a single friend to talk to about this.. I really am clueless and lonely :(

FML

2010-03-08T10:17:00.002+08:00

Life is pretty weird for me these days. Went back on Saturday by bus. I really dont know what to do on Saturdays and Sundays in that fucking apartment. Roommate's being a bitch as usual. I'm irritated by the sight of the guy whom i heard is actually really the owner of the unit. Question is if he's really the owner, then why are we paying the rent to that fucking old amn instead of him??? Anyways, back to my story, so i went back on Saturday. Followed mum and dad to a wedding dinner. It was ok. There were performances by some group of girls and they were LOUD!! And they were wearing skimpy clothes. Gosh in the middle of the dinner, i got really confused as to whether it's a wedding function or a freaking concert!! So we got back at around 11pm, just in time for my Arsenal v Burnley game. Man it was entertaining. 3-1!!! Bendtner missed like 10 chances to score. It just wasnt his day. Cesc was good and scored the 1st goal. Then he was substituted as he was having some hamstring problem. Theo scored the 2nd goal. It was really a good shot and i guess it just proved to some people that they were wrong for criticising him during the international friendly few days back when Chris Waddle claims that Theo doesnt have "football brain". Eat your heart out Chris!!! Back to the game, Arshavin scored like almost the last minute of the game. He also had a few chances earlier but all were wasted. I sometimes think he's a bit selfish. But as long as we got the 3 points i dont really care actually :P Of course, Theo was the man of the match :D 1 game down, 9 to go!!! If we could win in all remaining games, i really think we could win the premiership... Oh god, i'm freaking excited. It's close to 5 years since we've won any trophy. This could be our season. Haters can say what they want i dont really care much.

I've started parking outside the apartment as of yesterday. And when i go pay my rent today, old man better cut off my rm50 for parking. I would be bloody pissed if he doesnt wanna do it!!! I just freaking hate my roommate. When i told her yesterday that i'm going to park outside, she looked serious asking me why. I just say, "i just wanna park outside" and then turn the other way not wanting to continue the conversation. To hell with her. To hell with this apartment.

Oh yeah, i've made my decision that i'll go back to melaka at the end of the year, meaning i'll quit my job at the end of this year. I've had enough of work and life in kl. I hate it sooooooo fucking much!!! And the reason why i wanna wait till end of the year is ebcause i wanna save as much as i can and then move back and look for a job in melaka. I'm sure my boss would beg me to stay but i'm just over it. I hate her so much. Not professional at all!! Always with her husband, not caring much about her company. Even though i do my part, i'll still get scolding from client because she's always not in the office. Bottom line is

I HATE THIS LIFE!!!

Not gonna comment about Tigger. I might just give up one of these days.

Arsenal For Life!!!

2010-03-01T10:17:00.003+08:00

So last Friday was a public holiday. Decided to go back to Melaka. Took the bus to go home. I dont wanna explain my jourrney from my apartment to the bus stop outside and then to the lrt and straight to Pudu. It was fucking horrible so i'm not gonna explain any further in detail.

So Saturday was the match between Stoke City and Arsenal. But before that i watched the much talk about game which was Chelsea vs ManCity and the reason was John Terry and Wayne Bridge. As everyone know, JT had an affair with WB's ex-gf. Made her pregnant and then paid for the abortion. So the thing that everyone wants to see was whether WB will shake JT's hand before the game starts. And the thing about this handshake thing is that normally it will not be shown but for this game it was extra special and there was live coverage to see the handshake. I thought WB would shake his hand. But NO NO NO..... JT extended his hand to shake WB's hand but WB ignore him and went to shake the other player next to him. I mean WOWOWWWEEEEEE... That was an awesome thing to do on WB's part. But the worst part was the entire game, Chelsea fans were booing WB everytime he touched the ball... You cheer your idiot player and boo the VICTIM??? Very classy people -____- But fret not, ManCity trashed Chelsea 4-2... All i can say is HUAHUAHUAHUAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA!!!! Serves you right Mr. JT..

Anyway moving on to my lovely team.. Well i thought ManCity beating Chelsea was gonna be the highlight for Saturday but my team actually went on to take the spotlight.. All for the right and wrong reasons. As you know, Stoke City is famous for the throws especially from Delap. Their first goal was in fact a throw on the 8th minute. So we were trailing 1-0 until Bendtner, who is slowly becoming my favourite, headed our 1st goal. And it was 1-1 during the 1st half and then at the 66th minute, a nightmare happened in front of my eyes. Ryan Shawcross lunged at Aaron Ramsey, entering into a tackle, and left Ramsey's right leg hanging in a very awkward position. It was so hard to watch and they didnt even show replay cos it was so bad and awful. So for about 10 minutes, the game stopped and you could see the distraught faces on Vermaelen, Cesc, Sol, Clichy and most of our players. In the end, Ramsey was stretched off into an ambulance and the game continued. I was freaking nervous because we were at 1-1 and i wasnt sure whether we could win this game as the players were clearly so distracted by the injury. And then handball occured in the penalty box on the 90th+ minute and we were given penalty. It was a huge burden for Cesc to make sure he net this in to ensure a win and of course he scored!!! I was literally crying at this point. It was a very emotional moment for me and i'm sure for all Arsenal fans. Cesc dedicated that goal for Ramsey. And then just 3 minutes before the game ended, Vermaelen scored the 3rd goal and that was game over for Stoke. I was crying like a baby... You could see that on that night the players were men instead of boys. We knew that this was a great moment for us. At the end of the game, all the Arsenal players gather around in a circle and it just clearly showed that we were determined to win this for Ramsey and to win the league. I can clearly say that in this 6 years of supporting this team, this game was the one that reaffirmed my love for this team and that i was right to support this team. I;ve never cried for a game and i cried like a freaking baby for this game. Anyone who's not a fan or a football fan for that matter will think i'm weird and crazy but who cares. Now we have to make sure we win this league and win this for Ramsey and for those who dont believe in our team. Of course it was hard to celebrate the win because at the same time, we lost a player for the remainder of the season. But i think we are strong and we actually can win the league. After the injury i could see the firing spirit in every player. I am proud of this team. Even until now, whenever i read or hear bout the stoke game, i'll get so emotional that i dont wanna hear or read about it. Cesc showed why he deserved to be the captain, Sol tried to bring the team together which reminds me of the invincibles era, Clichy improved tremendously, Eboue was good, Bendtner is really fast to become my favourite, Vermaelen of course won my heart because of his reaction towards the injury and then went on to score and became the only defender with the highest number of goals in the whole league. Almunia was good too. Made a few good saves and of course the 1st goal cant be avoided so i wont blame him. I'm just so proud of this team. Screw all those who had no confidence in us. We are back and we will be champion this season!!!!!!

cny over so fast???

2010-02-23T09:52:00.003+08:00

Went back to my home sweet home 2 thursdays back. Left at about 7-ish am. Was sooo happy that the journey was awesome. No jam. Not many cars. That made it so smooth for me :D Reunion dinner was ok. New year was ok. Noticed that some relatives are kinda close to me in the cyber world (ie facebook) but when i see them face to face, they either ignore me or just simply say hi :( That was really pathetic. Anyways, not gonna dwell on it. Spent the whole damn week with the parents. We had open house on the 2nd day. It was jam pack with people. Of course i spent almost all my time with the 2 cuties Kareena and Anjali. They were sooooo cute and they're grown up so fast since i last saw them in November which was only 4 months back!! Ang pow collection were not that bad. Hihi :P What annoyed me was people kept asking when am i getting married or where is my boyfriend. Most people dont understand my situation so they were like saying it's a disrespect not to bring him during cny. Whateverrrr la..

Speaking of the bf, his birthday was on the 20th (Saturday) so i posted the ManU shirt which i bought a couple of weeks back. And thankfully it arrived on the exact date. The next day is of course our 6 years anniversary and the day when i come back here (ie HELL!!) Tigger said we'll get married next year. I hope everything will go according to plan. I want to quit this stupid job and go live with him in Perak, i think. Maybe get a job there? All is not planned properly yet so right now i really dont know what's what. Although his brother did ask me during thaipusam when are we getting married. Hmmmm... Right now, i think the only thing i can do is collect and save as much money as i can. That's a start right??.. Let's not talk about work because i dont wanna upset myself any further -___-

Missing my parents already. This Friday is a public holiday (YAYYY!!) But after that, there'll be no more holiday until the end of May!!! O.O

RANT

2010-02-09T09:40:00.002+08:00

Again, fed up with all the comments and thoughts by so called "supporters" and the media. I've had enough of hearing people taunting us and blaming the players and manager. Worst is when the winners taunt us. Dah menang tu gi main jauh jauh leeeee... Keep on making fun of us. Ya think your team is sooo great?? And then when AW blames other teams for our lost, the media screw us. When he blames his own players for the lost, the media again screw us. What the fuck?? I seriously think people are just being stupid. And people like Ballack and Evra should just shut their fucking mouth. Go play instead of commenting bout other team/players. And i am fucking sure that if we win against Liverpool, the media/busybodies would still belittle us -___- These people should just stay the fuck away from us.

End of rant.

not in the mood to even think of a title

2010-02-08T10:52:00.004+08:00

Well, the result was a disappointing one. 2-0. Couldnt sleep well after that. Sooo freaking depressinggg.. I'm sure after this, there will be people calling for Arsene to resign or be sacked. Once again, i am totally against this. I mean, come onnn.. This man made Arsenal. Of course he didnt buy anyone during the Jan transfer but you really cant blame him for all the losses. Maybe its just not our luck. Well, i would want a new keeper and someone strong forward. Almunia is just getting crappier. Mistake after mistake and he still hasnt learn anything. Compare to Cech last night, Almunia is like someone who doesnt even know how to do his stuff -.-"" This made me miss Jens Lehmann soooo freaking much. Cesc and Arshavin were okay but they just couldnt score. Defense were shaky as usual. Dont know what's going on with Theo. I miss van Persie :'( He would have done something to make sure we're still in the title race.. Hmmpphhh... That said, i still have so much of love for this team. Not gonna complain or criticise like all this shitty "fans" are doing right now. Next game is against Liverpool. Pleeeaaassseeeee win. Come on, Gunnerssssss.. Let's forget the past and move forward.

half time

2010-02-08T00:59:00.002+08:00

Here i am blogging at half time and we're down 2-0. Both goals scored by hurricane Drogba.. It was really disappointing watching this game. I really dont know what is Almunia doing. I'm really trying my best not to curse him but he just disappoints all of us time and time again. Hummpphhhh i really hope things will get better in second half. Right now i'm just sitting here, praying that we'll somehow score (a lot) during the second half. Come on, Gunners.. Please do something.. Oh well, second half is on the way now. Whether we win or lose, i'll only blog about it tomorrow. Please oh please please please please please let us WIN!!!!

Shitty girl

2010-02-07T21:39:00.003+08:00

As i sit here in the living room, facing my shitty roommate and her "boyfriend", i feel like puking!! I hate her mainly because she doesnt do any housework, lazy, and most of all, likes to bring friends to the apartment. I absolutely HATE it sooooo fucking much. How would she feel if i bring my friends (guys and girls) to the apartment? I'm sure she'd feel uncomfortable. That's what i'm feeling right now. Thought i'd sit in the hall, try to calm and relax myself before the BIG game.. But NOOOOOOO...... She had to bring one of her guy friend at this time. Now i sit facing them, i just feel like slapping their faces -_____________-

Okay i think i'll leave my laptop in the hall and go into my room to do some reading and then i'll be out again at 12am sharp!! :D Think happy thoughts.. Hope Arshavin win me some goals and also my Captain Fantastico!!! Come on Gunners.. Let's win at Stamford Bridge today!!!

Still nervous

2010-02-07T19:00:00.002+08:00

OM-freaking-G!!! I'm still nervous like shit!!!! I cant wait for 12am to come. I really dont think i can sleep until the whistle blows signalling the end of the game. Damn, i think i'll look like a zombie tomorrow in the office.. But what the hell.. I'll do it again a million time :P

I'm back on twitter but it's no longer fun. I wish everything were like last year where i tweet and people reply or when i reply people's tweet. But oh well, life not fair right.. omg what the hell am i writing?? What has life not being fair got to do with tweeting? O___O Aaahhh dang it, this nervous feeling is really affecting me.. Well gotta go have my dinner now.. I'm pretty sure i'll be back after this :P

Nervous day

2010-02-07T16:55:00.002+08:00

So yesterday i went to Curve and Ikano to look for CNY clothes. Most of the baju are either soooo kolot or dont look nice at all. The ones i really berkenan pula cannot fit and most of them make my ass look fucking HUGE! Like as huge as Kim K's (no offense Miss K, i love you) so in the end i decided to just wear the dress i bought months earlier. I went to Al-Ikhsan to buy a ManU shirt for Tigger's birthday. He doesnt know it so i'm gonna post it to him few days before his birthday. Then i went to Nike in Cineleisure to look at their jerseys. And i bought the Arsenal ladies jersey. I;m wearing it now hehe :D It feels so bloody nice to wear an original one :P

Speaking of the best team in the world, today's the game against Chelsea. I am soooo bloody nervous. Cant stop thinking bout it. It's like a do or die thingy. We HAVE to WIN this game. I'm just praying hard that we win. Enough of people condemning us for everything. Enough of people speaking crap bout the players and the professor. It's time for us to shine. This has to be OUR season. Well, we just gotta wait for the game tonight. I know for sure i cant sleep tonight until the end of the game. Ahh how i wish i can watch the game on tv. Even though i have live streaming but its so freaking slow and keeps buffering. Well, what can you expect when its FREE and LIVE -.-

3 more days to go before i go back to my HOME SWEET HOME.. Cant wait. But first gotta get through tonight before i can think bout going back :P

I wanna go backkk

2010-02-04T15:12:00.003+08:00

Still have not started tweeting again. These few days i feel so moody and stressed and angry and tired. All in one -____- Work is just killing me. I cant wait till next week comes. I cant wait to go back and see my parents, sleep on MY bed in MY room, eat mom's food, watch tv and just replax in my HOME.

Right now, i feel like a robot with no friends around me. No one i can talk to. No one i can hang out with. There is one though. but i know her sole purpose of asking me out is so that she can sell some insurance thingy to me. I told her before that i already have a few insurance but she's just so fucking stubborn -.- Keep calling me saying she missed me and wanna hang out. But i'm not stoopid la to fall into her trap and believe that she actually misses me. Besides, the one time i hung out with her, it was the most boring day everrr. She goes into EVERY shop at the mall, looking at almost everything but never buy anything. The only thing she bought was a packet of strawberries from a stall -________-

I'm tired of everything. i wish i'm at some very nice place. Like NZ. Oh, how i miss that place soooooo much. I miss the air, the friendly people, the museums, the hills and mountains, the sheeps and cows. I miss everything. It's like when you're there, you wont think about your problems. I KNOW i'll go back there some day. And i hope when i go back there, it's for good. Stay there foreverrrr.. That would be nice.

This week i'm gonna have to go hunt for CNY baju. I think i have to go by myself. As usual, who will want to go with me. Anyway i dont really like shopping with friends. I'll be back to my home sweet home next Wed, i think. Whippppeeeeee!!!! xD

This Sunday is a BIG game for Arsenal. We'll be up against Chelsea. And i do seriously hope and pray that we WIN. Last week was depressing. Even until now, i'm so fucking sad. And to add salt to the wound, there were rumours going around that Cesc and Eboue might leave after this season. I hope NOT!! i dont want anyone to leave except maybe for Almunia and Denilson :P I want Henry back actually. But i know it wont happen anytime soon -.-

ENOUGH!!

2010-02-03T09:14:00.004+08:00

I'm getting pretty sick and tired of some people who kutuk Arsene Wenger and some even set up a blog for a petition to sack him.. I mean what the fuck?? This shows that they're not even true fans at all. When we win, the love and support kept pouring like a heavy rain. But when we lose, they do all this shit. If you think you're better than why dont YOU become the manager instead? What the hell are you doing now? Of course i know AW might have been wrong in not buying anyone during the Jan transfer but at least he did plan to buy Villa and Smalling. But maybe luck wasnt in our side to get either one of them. Besides i'm sure he just doesnt wanna buy ANYONE. If i'm not mistaken the only striker who was bought/loaned was Robbie Keane. I just dont understand why the media and some so-called "supporters" are sooooo freaking harsh on him. I wish i could just ask them to buzz off. I'm sick and tired of going into a blog thinking there was something worth reading and all that is in front of me is the notion that AW should resign or be sacked. There are some rational blogs around but i think the ones dominating are those pathetic losers' blog..

In Arsene I trust.

Twitter

2010-02-01T14:32:00.002+08:00

I've had Twitter since August, i think. It's where you update your status anytime you want about anything. Of course, its limited to 140 characters :P So far i've had about 5,ooo+ tweets. I've even gotten replies from celebrities like Chris Masterson who always reply my tweets :D and also the one from Ray Parlour, Arsenal legend :D :D :D Of course the normal replies would be from Kira, the girl i know from aar site who's from UAE and my aar friends.

However, as of Saturday, i've noticed that i have no interest in tweeting anymore. I seldom get any replies and i feel like there's nothing for me to update on. And i dont think any of my friends even care that i dont tweet anymore. Of course the only person who's always asking about me and missing me is Kira from so far awayyy.

So i might stop tweeting for a while and spend more time doing other useful things like reading and doing some other important things. If i dont miss it too much then i might just delete my profile :P

P/S: I'm STILL a huge Arsenal fan. I'll never ever change my love for this team. No matter what. As they say, win or lose, we're in this together.. Or something like that la :P So please dont "invite" me to join any other teams okthanxbai :D

Arsenal 1 ManU 3

2010-02-01T11:57:00.003+08:00

Well, the title says it all. I think it was a horrible game. It all started with that ridiculous own goal by Almunia. I think he's getting worst. Should've let Mannone be No. 1. Arshavin.. Oh lord.. I really dont know what to say about him. He has always been my favourite and i know that some day he is gonna get better and can even come up to TH's level but last night he was totally out of it. Why is he being sooooo freaking selfish?!! It was clear that some of his team mates were annoyed with his attitude. Did he leave his talent in Russia?!!!! Denilson.. no comment.. He shouldnt have played at all. I think the best (if there is) in the team was Song. Vermaelen scored the only goal but it was clearly too late. How could someone who was suspected of a broken leg few days ago score but not the others is beyond me. Frustrating. Disappointing. I really thought we could win this time. We HAVE to win this Sunday against Chelsea. There's still some faith in me that we would lift the trophy this season.

How i miss Van Persie so fucking much. He wouldnt have let this happen. FML!

too long

2010-01-31T21:33:00.002+08:00

Wow!! It's been sooooo freaking long since my last post which was August 2009!! It's 31st January 2010 nowww!! :O Many things happened since August. Not gonna go into details but i'll just jot down as many as i can remember.

Saw the All-American Rejects in October. Highlight of the year, if not my life :D Love them since way back and it really was a dream come true when i saw each of them at Pavilion during the "meet and greet". The concert was THE BOMB!! Of course made so many mew friends through Rejects' site. Met most of them at OU and on the concert day itself. And i'm still keeping in touch with some of them.

Went to New Zealand in November and i LOVED it. We stayed in Lynn's dad's place. His house is huge and the land around it has trees (lemon, apple!, orange,), a mini bee farm and flowers. Gosh i miss it now :( We went on a yatch (my 1st ever!) owned by Lynn's friend. We had an awesome dinner party at another one of her friend's house. Houses there are the bomb!! We went to the museum and it was the best museum everrr... The last few days we went to Rotorua. So many beautiful placesss. Malas wanna write her. Ask me personally and i'll show pics and tell :P haha!! Anyway i'll post pics later when i have the mood :D

Family is doing well. I make sure i go back every chance i have to see Mummy and Daddy. Adiran's doing pretty well apart from the nose thingy he had a while back but all's good now. Work has improved although not at the pace that i want.

Tigger's back in Perak setting up the farm. I miss him with every breathe that i take. Sometimes the loneliness will drive me to think of nonsense. And nonsense is not good for me. I crave the attention and the touch. Of course i'm doing ok at the moment because i just saw him yesterday <3

so i went to Batu Caves yesterday to carry milk pot. On Friday, Tigger came to pick me at about 8pm. Was so jam everywhere. We stayed in a hotel in Kepong. By 'we' i mean me, Tigger , his parents, his sis and his bro. Mikael did not come. So we had our dinner and supper at the cafe beside the hotel. I think it's called "myasia1 cafe" or something. Then we had a 3 hours sleep and left for Batu Caves at about 3am. Surprisingly it wasnt as packed and jam as last year. Of course the highlight of the day was the stupid fight which was so near to us. Some group of guys were coming towards us, fighting and throwing things at each other. We ran like shit. For a moment i was terrified because as i ws running i turned behind to look for Tigger but couldnt see him. I panicked. Almost screamed. But then i saw him and a sense of relief came. All the way up until before we reach the first step of the stairs, i was holding back tears. I was really scared. Probably the scariest time of my life. Ever. Then we reached the top and finish the prayers and i was standing beside Tigger's dad, waiting for the rest when suddenly 3 guys passed me and i smelled alcohol. One of the guy turned to me and said something like "hi" and i was scared again. Turned to look for Tigger's dad but couldnt find him. So i stood beside one of the photographer. I dont even know why these idiotic morons would walk up while drunk. What's the purpose of that?? People these days have really forgotten about the moral values and shit. Anyways, we went back to hotel at almost 9am. Slept for a while, took a bathe and went for lunch at a nearby vegetarian restaurant. Food was fucking good :D Then we sent his sis back to Cheras and they sent me back here. All in all, it was a great day despite that 2 stupid shit that happened. Oh ya, did i mentionTigger's bald now? hehe.. He still looks good. No matter what ;)

Now here i am, waiting for the Arsenal v ManU game at 12am. I really hope Arsenal wins. Possibly with goals from Captain Fab and Arshavin. This is OUR season. We HAVE to win no matter what!!

Just finish reading Khaled Hosseini's The Kite Runner and it was freaking GOOD! i'll give it 12 stars out of 10. One of THE best books i've read. And believe me i've read a lot of good books but this one is currently at the top.It's really a moving story about family, friendship, brotherhood, love, betrayal disappointment, hope, trust, and most importantly LOYALTY. To me, thats the main theme of the book. And this is the only book where i have not seen the movie first before reading the book. And i'm glad that i didnt. Now i'm gonna look for the dvd :D Read P.S. I Love You and kinda disappointed. Mostly because i've watched the movie wayyyyy before reading the book -___- Shouldnt have done that. Now i have i think 2 more books where i've already seen the movie but not yet read the book. They're New Moon and The Time Traveler's Wife. Saw New Moon with Tigger (yayy) and saw the latter during the flight back from NZ to Brunei.

Okay this the my attempt to revive my blog. Anyway i know no one reads it but its alright. It's more for myself actually. A place for me to vent and share my happiness and sorrow and all that shit :D

Byeeee...

future....

2009-08-02T16:09:00.002+08:00

well its been a while since i last wrote. many things hapenned (as usual)..first up, man. utd. went for the training and game..it was good seeing my parents at the game....was so happy to see them..

i've been thinking a lot about my life the past few weeks. tigger told me that there is a possibility that his parents will go see my parents end of this year to talk about engagement and marriage. of course hearing bout this made me feel happy but i still have a lot on my mind like money and where are we going to settle down, etc....and then there is the subject of children. i'm not sure how many i want but i hope all my future children will be happy having me and tigger as parents. of course i want them to have the best education, best home, best life possible...but i'm not sure whether i want to raise them in this country...i'm still keeping my dream of starting a family in australia or new zealand...actually coem to think of it, any good country would do...dont get me wrong, i love this country but the things that have been going on for the past few years is really making me sick...today was the day that made me reassure myself that i wont be raising my children here when i saw the clip of a few men beating up a guy in police custody. there was speculation that it was "tbh" but it was quite blur so it was hard to decipher...but that clip was really out of the line and i promise myself that i wont raise my children here and i might also want my parents to come live with me (whichever country i choose to live in the future)..of course tigger's parents might not want us to move to another country but......(we'll see)...i really dont know about my future...i always have a plan for myself for the future but this time its all a blur and i cant really pull myself together to make any plans at all as i really dont know where to start....

on a lighter note, i got a raise in my salary although it was not equivalent to the amount of suffering i've to go through...hmmm...its been a year working here and i've gone through shit but i'm still surviving....i've become stronger and more patient...i really dont know how long will i be in this firm or where i'll be heading in the future but i guess no matter what, i'll survive..i will be able to go through it...i just hope everything goes well for me....

i miss mummy and daddy so much....its been a month since i last went back home...i miss my home and my real bed....

married???

2009-07-09T21:47:00.002+08:00

its been so long since i last wrote...many things happened..most of them i dun even wanna mention....some are good but most are bad..anyway, i'm looking forward to the man utd game next week (july 17th for training n 18th for the game against the malaysian team)...dad got the tickets so i'm pretty excited...now i know arsenal is my fav team but who would wanna give up the chance to see to see man utd especially when they've already got tickets....

this sunday will be meeting my primary school friend in 1u whom i've not seen for at least 13 freaking years!!! she called me few weeks back out of the blue and said she misses me a lot and wanna meet up so that would be this sunday....

normally the weekends would be crappy for me as i usually stay at home watching dvds n eating n cleaning the hse but not this week....and i'm quite excited as i get to brush up on my social skills...tigger is going for his hotel's futsal tournament this sunday and he doesnt need to work so i might be able to see him longer this time...speaking of him, his bro suggested that we be the first to get married n not his 2nd bro as planned...i was kinda shocked when i first heard tigger told me..then i said i think its best if we get engaged next year and get married in 2011....i need to plan everything accordingly especially financial wise....plus i dun think getting married this year or next year is wise for me as i'm still planning for my life goals n plans.....of course when i was younger i used to say that i would wanna get married when i reach 25, but as i grow older i started thinking a lot about life and all that and even though getting married is something that almost all my friends have been thru, its just not the time for me..YET. getting married is a big step and i've not even discuss this with my parents..i'm not sure what they'll think bout it.....

bye.

2009-04-03T16:08:00.003+08:00

am i disturbing u? did i do anything wrong to u? i thought u were always cool with me....then why the fuck are u not answering my messages? why do u always ask me to contact u and when i do, u dont answer me or give any reply? am i such a lousy friend? i seriously dont know what the hell is wrong with u....i mean, i'm grateful for what u have done for me...but why r u suddenly giving me the shit when i have done nothing but being grateful to u? i always regard u as one of my most trusted friend in the world but i guess u just never liked me at all...i guess u prefer the other one than me..although it doesnt make any sense as to y is there any preference in the first place... well, thanks for being my friend anyway...call me when u r bored or when u want to kill time...as u know, u can use me as much as u want....because unlike u, i'm the type of person who appreciates friends as i only have a handful...

bye.

2009-04-01T13:18:00.002+08:00

sometimes when u feel like everything is in order and blissful, something or rather someone will come to destroy it. when u r at the point where no one can help u, what do u do? give up or continue this damn fucking life?

i'm currently at a very low point in my life right now. i've made the necessary complains and all but it is still the same. what can i do? where can i go? i hope someone can come hold my hand and save me from this mess. i admit there are times when i feel like ending my life. since no one can help me, the only thing i can do is to go away from this earth.

i complained to tigger but there's nothing he can do. all he can offer is advice. i complained to mum but there's nothing she can do. in fact i think she's a little fed up with me. everytime i call her i feel like she just cant wait to put down the phone. am i such a disappointment to u? am i really embarassing to u? i complained to hairen but there's also nothing she can do. i complained to sara and andrea but nothing...

should i end my life just so everyone can live in peace? so that they dont need to hear my complains anymore? every second, all i can hear in my mind is die...die...die...

i'm sick and tired of all this... i need to end this... now.

2009-03-03T10:23:00.002+08:00

i'm losing my mind again. i cant think properly. sometimes suicide even comes to my mind. other days, i just feel like running away. i just cant sit in the office doing nothing. most of the time i've to wait for her to come into the office to settle all my work. and she's hardly in office nowadays. i kmow its for a serious matter but i just cant take it. why am i stuck here? why must i be tortured here? jobs are difficult to find in this bad state of economy. nowadays i find it hard to sleep at night. i hate my life. i hate staying here. i hate the people here. i hate everything in my life now.

tigger's got a job interview for internship in singapore. if he really get the job, it'll be worst for me. that time i think i'll just give up on life. however i cant ask him to stay here for the sake of me. i've to let him go for his own future. and when its time, only then will i know what to do.

u.

2009-03-02T14:53:00.002+08:00

-u were nvr there for me, so stop pretending that u care about me. i know i dont.

-u pretend that i'm your bestest friend. but please. i dont need u.

-u think i dont know what u're doing behind my back. but think again. i'm not as dumb as u think i am.

-everytime i see u, i feel like that is the end of the world.

-i hate seeing u so happy behind me but when i'm around, u act as if someone raped u just to get sympathy from me.

-dont get me started on ur pathetic emo life.

-i think i should ask chris brown to whack u nicely so that u know what it feels like to abandon ur friends.

-i noticed that everytime i said i wanna do something or buy something or go somehere, u will overtake me and do it. get a life.

-i think u're just a piece of shit, no?

-one day when u've realised ur mistakes, u'll see that it's already too late as i've moved on. having a much better life without u. thanks, much.

2009-03-02T14:09:00.002+08:00

lately i've been feeling empty. like no emotions or feelings. i really dont know why. met up with andred and sara yesterday and although i've not seen them for quite some time, i didnt feel excited or happy. of course i was laughing all the way when they were joking around but then i still feel empty inside. even now, at work, i feel so low and emotion-less. i need some excitement in my life. i need someting to look forward to. well, actually there is. i'm going back to melaka this saturday as monday is a public holiday. but i still feel empty because it'll be another 4 days till i go back.

tigger started his new job in jaya 33 in nagomi. he works 8 hours per day with 3 hours of break!!! what a nice job. halfway work can go back to sleep for a couple of hours and then back to work again... best...

dad came last saturday. was soooo glad to see him. we then went to my sen sei's house in kepong. had lotsa sushi. yumm yumm.. after that my cravings to make sushi came back after it was gone for a year. hehe... will try to do it now that i have more time on my hands.

semua pun boleh...

2009-02-27T13:52:00.002+08:00

the malaysian political situation is becoming more and more like a scene from the o.c. or one tree hill or ugly betty. it is so ridiculous sometimes to see that some of these politicians act a fool in front of the nation and dengan tak malu some more. from the murder to the sd drama to the sodomy to the "naked" pics to the scuffle in front of parliament. there is a reason why i put the word naked in an inverted comma. its because its not even a naked pic. i dont know what these ppl thought when they saw the pics. bukannye bogel pon...

today's news was the karpal singh case where the bUMNO flers wanted to berlawan with him cos he called them "celaka". i really dont get it. there was only protest when the idiot fler called the non-malays "pendatang" but when karpal called them "celaka", they wanna bertumbuk pula...some more outside the parliament and the secutrity wasn't doing anything to calm the situation. i'm getting very fed-up with all these la. there are more important issues to tackle like the economy, poverty and "murder". but all these ppl care about is who said what to who, who did what to who and who make what with who...

they have to buck up now or face another hummiliation wen everyone losses faith in the govt.

i hate all the three punk tarts!!!

2009-02-26T15:01:00.003+08:00

sometimes ppl juz dont learn from either their own or other ppl's past experience. living in this cruel world, they need to know basic survival skills and a brain. in this era, the most important thing is of course not to trust anyone (except maybe your own family members...that is also sometimes not true). secondly, one needs to be smart...and when i say smart it's not in the sense of education, more of in the sense of street smart. be smart and learn to be safe and cautious...dont do stupid mistakes... if nothing excites you in your life, dont pandai-pandai go find trouble just cos you were bored or to show off. i have a friend (or used to have...i'm ashamed to call him my friend) lets call him jon. well, jon is known for his very notorious behaviour. however he's not ott when me or some of my friends are around. it seems he likes to show off, act cool in front of girls and be friends with almost anyone (konon-nye a happening guy la). the thing i dont like is about him is that i hate ppl who pretends to be goody-goody in front of you but is a maniac behind you. i've never liked this friend and after the news i heard today, i will never have respect for him.anymore. i wouldn't even wanna see him or talk to him because i know all my advice will go to the longkang so i'd better not waste my saliva.

another thing i learn today is appreciate everything you have in your life...be it your family, job, education,etc...because someone else is having a much harder and tougher life. dont ask for more when you already have enough, dont take advantage of those around you and dont be too greedy. greed will get you nowhere except into some very dirty and horrible place.

its been a moody week. and i dont like it. i prefer to have a bright and sunny day and rain at night. i cant even go anywhere without taking into consideration that it might rain anytime.

daddy is coming this saturday for some aikido function. not sure whether mummy is coming or not. hope she comes. anyway, i ordered some food from her and she said she'll prepare them for me (yipee!!!)

last night my roommie came back late and started packing her stuff in the dark as she does not want to disturb me but it was a bit noisy and creepy. i think she's moving either this friday or saturday. after this i'll have no girl to complain about work and my housemates except for tigger, of course. i'm quite sad actually cos she's a much better roomie than mrs. bean. anyway, when i woke up today, half of her things were gone and she even took off her bed sheet. felt so sad.anyway, i hope she's ok and will not get too stress about her work...

2009-02-25T11:01:00.002+08:00

this few weeks have been like a roller coaster ride. many things happened which made me realise that i need to do more to improve myself as a person.

first up, my first ever experience at batu caves for thaipusam. it was really a last-minute decision to carry the milk pot. i had to get a yellow punjabi suit and the pot which i bought in klang. on the day itself, we woke up at about 12 something a.m. and reached there at about 2 a.m. then we had to go to the river to get the blessing of the priests and the starting of the milk pot journey. i was actually quite terrified because before my turn, i saw some of them who took the milk pot was actually possessed. i thought it would also happen to me once i carry it. i almost wanted to quit but decided that since i've already bought all the stuff, i might as well just do it. thank god i wasn't possessed like them :) so we walked from the river to the 200 over steps and up the cave and then giving the pot to the priest to pour it over the statue of the god. all the way up to the cave, i was saying all my prayers and hopes and dreams. all in all, it was a great experience for me and i vow to go there every year.

just got to know that my boss' husband had cancer of the nose. poor thing.... he actually cried yesterday when someone called to ask about him. i know what it's like to go through it. so these few days, they've been in and out the office and i just dont wanna complain much.

on a lighter note, i passed my cfm paper!!! yay.... now, i can officially say i have 2 degrees and i do not need to sit for anymore exams.... i only need to work towards getting the necessary work experience and then i can apply for my license as a chartered secretary. however, i still want to work and build my career and life either in australia or new zealand. i'm still looking for ways to apply to work overseas. with my ciput salary here in malaysia, i cant progress and improve so i need to get away from here...

dead

2009-02-20T14:34:00.002+08:00

i'm at a very low point in my life right now.... nothing seems right for me... everything from work to my god-damn apartment. work especially is really pissing me off. now the beloved hubby is in hospital and she has not been in office for about 2 days. and i got scolding by many people most notably that bloody datuk.

my fucking apartment is another headache. one of them will go in the toilet from 7.30am-8am. what the hell!!! becasue of that i've to wake up extra early but sometimes i overslept so i'll have to wait for that bitch to come out and it pisses me off to see any one of them.

why cant i have a peaceful life?

is it only peaceful for me when i'm dead?

what the fuck?!?!

2009-01-22T10:27:00.002+08:00

got scolding from a client this morning. and its a client who has been nice to me all this while. i think he cannot tahan anymore because this time he really was pissed. before this, he was very soft-spoken. anyway he complained that my dear boss didnt do her job and its been pending for few weeks. now that its late, there will be penalties imposed on them. fuck! she's handling the file and now i kena marah pula just because he called the office and she's not around (as usual). i really feel like punching her face la. yesterday, she was dunno doing what at her table and she suddenly feel asleep. i mean, hello.... you're not the one doing all the work in the office and you feel sleepy??? and because of your cough yesterday i almost kena jangkit from you. luckily i feel much better now. see, i'm stronger than you mentally, physically and emotionally. argghhh...i cant wait for tomorrow to end. i just cant take it. stupid ass bitch...

2009-01-21T10:14:00.002+08:00

my anger now is at tahap gila..... this morning, a client came in and told me he had an appointment at 9.30 am. so i called the pelahap and she said she'll be there in 5 minutes time. so i told the client la and i can see from his face that he's pissed. he said that if they're not here by then, he'll have to leave cos he has other appointment. so in they came at 9.45am. spoke to the client for about 15minutes and then the client left and suddenly i noticed that the office is exceptionally empty and quiet. then i realised that they left for god-knows-what. argghhhh...i totally hate and despise them. furthermore, she has been having very bad cough these past few weeks and she doesn't close her mouth everytime she coughs and last night my throat felt a bit pain and today i have slight sorethroat. ahhh fuck her....some more i asked her about my increment last monday and she said she usually give increment on annual basis. annual my ass la!!! other people get increment after confirmation ok. booooo.... some more takde bonus. what kind of stupid system is that...

increment/bonus? - ilek(tamil for dont have)

2009-01-19T10:03:00.003+08:00

i've been doing a lot of cleaning and clearing up in my office. so many unnecessary rubbish occupying the office...no wonder there are hardly any space around. some more last friday she and beloved hubby left early so i took the opportunity to clear up whatever i feel is unnecessary. plus, she asked me to try to give any ideas to change the outlook of the office so as to make it more spacious as she does not intend to move to a new place due to the economy. in the end, i have to do everything. i dont mind doing everything, but guess what??? she doesn't even give me increment after confirmation. also no bonus. i intend to ask her about my increment today. fingers crossed.

on a happier note, i managed to get a bus ticket to melaka this saturday at 9 am. at first i was supposed to tumpang sara but last minute she told me that she forgot that her back seat got no seat belt. what the...??? i asked her a couple of weeks back as to whether can tumpang and dont tell me she nvr thought of it??? arggghhh...i'm not mad about being uninvited but because she nvr tell me earlier...because of that i've to ask dad to buy me a ticket but he told me that there are no more tickets for transnasional. so i've to go all the way to pudu to get ticket. luckily the oh-so reliable kkkl has tickets for saturday. if all buses are out of tickets, i dunno what to do la....tension....

pelahap!!!

2009-01-13T14:23:00.003+08:00

rupa-rupanye my boss pelahap went to bali for a friend's wedding. some more can talk about it the whole day yesterday when there are lots of work to be done. ishh ishh.... even when clients came or when they call, she also told them. adoi..no need to get so excited la. plz get all the work done first then when there's extra time, that's when u can talk about it la. these few days not much work is done cos of her. my hatred towards her and her pelahap husband is increasing by the minute. even now she's not in the office...boo to idiot people...

but....i'm calm cos i'll be going back to melaka next saturday for 9 days. yes yes...i wont be seeing their faces for 9 whole days.

so last saturday, i went for slumber party in tigger's house. in short we went to kepong, renaissance hotel and royal park hotel in kl. both the hotels were for the airline interview. they said they'll call him if he gets the job. i hope he does cos i want him to be happy with the job that he wants.

this week, i'll be slumbering in tigger's house as well. we might go to the mid valley jobstreet career fair...

what i miss and dont miss and dont like...

2009-01-09T13:43:00.002+08:00

i miss my mummy and daddy. i miss adrian. i miss melaka. i miss eating the melaka raya wan tan mee, the chicken rice ball, the banana leaf rice, the roti canai, the chai tau kue, the bkt beruang pasar malam mee goreng and the jiki's kue teow soup. i miss melaka's short distance routes. i miss going to mahkota parade and dataran pahlawan. i miss going out with friends. i miss the aikido ppl who have great sense of humour.

i dont miss the irritating friends who used me. i dont miss the bastards who gave me hell few years back. i dont miss the "friend" who pretended to be my friend just so she could pikat my boyfriend.

pendek kata...

i miss everything.

i wanna go back melaka. now.

i cant wait for another 2 weeks.

i dont like kl.

and pj.

i dont like the traffic jam.

i dont like the loneliness in my office.

i dont like being alone everywhere i go.

i dont like that there's no one to cook for me and wash clothes for me.

basically i dont like anything about this place.

huh...

a new resolution

2009-01-09T09:56:00.003+08:00

sometimes i feel that because of the mixed religion that i'm attached with since i was born, i actually have to at least know something about both religion. i should actually. but because i'm born into a family which is not so strict in terms of religion and culture, i end up not knowing a single thing about either religion. i do know just a little bit more about my chinese side and i'm totally clueless about my indian side. in indian culture there are many types of prayers and festivals. i used to think that deepavali is the only festivals the hindus celebrate. but upon knowing tigger, i learn that there are many other special festivals and prayers. of course, i would at times follow him to temples for prayers. but what i dont like about going to temples is that people would stare weirdly at me and that would aggitate me. and then i'll start cursing and right after that i'll feel guilty cos i realise that i'm cursing in the temple. i would like to learn more about both sides of my cultures.

so now, my new new year's reso would be to learn the cultures of both chinese and indian.

ta.

pantek punya boss

2009-01-08T13:20:00.005+08:00

my ever hardworking boss is out of the country and will only be back next monday. niceeee..... work here berlambak and she can go overseas pula. geramnye...

anyway, there's a new temporary staff here. she only be here for 2 months or so. she's doing the data entry stuff for my office accounts. she's actually waiting for her spm results which will only be out in march. so i guess she'll be here till march. i like her. she has a sweet smile. likes to ask a lot of questions about me. well, at least i have got a teman here. i'm now typing this entry in my boss' office while she's sitting in my place. she asked me whether she can use the internet so i said ok. haha.... i dont care... my boss asked me to look and monitor her but i just dont care. i let her answer personal calls and sms during work, i let her stare and relax during work...hehe..jahat kan aku?... but i dont care. as long as she does her work then ok la....relek le bruder....dont so tensed during work like me...hehe...not good for your health. but seriously i feel nice that there's someone here i can talk and chat with. at least i'm chatting with a human being instead of to myself or "some other thing" hehe....

after work today, will be teman-ing tigger to the photo studio to take shots of his full self. he is attending the interview for flight attendant for emirates this sunday. i will be temaning him to go for the interview too. hmmmmm...maybe i should dress up nicely and wear super-high heels and make up myself well and teman him,,,maybe when the interviewer ternampak me then like my appearance then hire me on the spot...muahahahahahaha (evil laughter)...perasan la me......

another 2 weeks till i go back to my lovely melaka. i'm taking 1 week leave which means i'll be off for 9 days, longer than my christmas leave....muaahahahahahaha (evil laughter, again). i cant wait to go back. this time adrian will also be back but he's only on leave on the eve, 1st and 2nd day :( but anyway, better 3 days than no days at all.... i just wonder how might our relatives react now since adrian and me now has careers of our own. will they be jealous or just keep quiet like they always so? i guess they'll be much more interested in adrian's career than mine. they'll ask him which countries he has gone to, how much is his pay, bla bla bla....as for me, i predict they'll just ask me what and where am i working and thats it. complete silence. there's nothing much to say about my career. funny when adrian wasn't in this industry, no one even bothered to ask about him. now they're so interested. always ask whether got any free or discounted tickets. hello saudara mara ku....we the family still not yet get you think you can get ah???? we also never ask him for free tickets as much as you do la.....

enough of bitching.

now have to get back to work.

ta.

2-0-0-9

2009-01-06T14:19:00.003+08:00

had a great time celebrating the new year's eve with tigger. although half the time i was tipsy. luckily there were no incriminating evidence lying around :) anyway, on new year's eve, we went to watch yes man in cineleisure in the evening. after that we just walked around and there were many people and it was jam-packed. i felt like sardine walking around. the fireworks in the curve was great. after that we went back to tigger's place in sg buloh.

during the weekend, we went back to tigger's place again. on saturday, me, tigger, his mum and 2 bros went to a temple in brickfields. after that, we went to batu caves. it was my first time there so i felt a bit jakun-y. later that night, we went to klang to visit tigger's family temple. right after that, we went to tigger's grandmother's house. we were there for bout half an hour. before we left, his grandmother grabbed my hand and brought me to look around the house. i felt so loved eventhough i dont understand her language.

well, had to come back to work on monday which was hell. so many work to do but bitch came in at about 12 something. then went out again to go to the bank. hello mak cik, you dont know that i'm suffering here, cleaning up your former staff's ass, and you can go mengembara with your ass-husband. and speaking of him, please ask him to brush his teeth once in a while la.

i cant tahan his stinky breath.

and i hate it when you try to push everything to me so that you can be free and hang out with your husband. if i have no other work then it's ok la. my work here berlambak here and you wanna top up more work for me. cettt!!!!

all your clients actually wanna scold you but since you're always not in the office, they divert their anger towards me pula. iisssshhhhhh..... if it is not because of the economy, i would have quit this job already...

on a lighter note, tigger might attend the walk-in interview for emirates for the position of flight steward this sunday.

y is everyone in the airline service nowadays???

what about me???

i cant cos i'm too short... :(

new year, new life, new me...

2008-12-30T09:16:00.003+08:00

it's only less than 40 hours till the new year. time passes so fast and it's so scary that we're getting older every year :) many things happened in 2008. of course the biggest highlight was me going to another state to start my career. this year, i learnt to be independant and not to let people bully me. i learnt to appreciate my family more. i learnt that if you want something, go for it and dont waste time thinking whether you should do it or not. also, as i dont have many friends i learnt to appreciate the handful that i have.

for 2009, i have a few goals that i have set for me!

i would want to lose weight as i am now putting on a few kgs here and there. some pants and blouses felt tight already :(

i want to be more organised next year.

i want to start saving for my new zealand trip.

i will be more patient with a certain someone who i see everyday.

i will learn to cook something else other than curry.

i will learn to speak better mandarin.

i will eat healthily and drink more water (as i had 2 occurence of very embarassing but painful problems)

i will try to stay as long as i can in my current job as the economy is predicted to be worse next year.

well, thats all i can think of. i will add on once i can think of other resolutions. till then,

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2009

christmas in melaka

2008-12-30T09:08:00.002+08:00

went back to melaka for christmas and again had a blast. was with the parents most of the time. went out with andrea and raymond raman to see the eye of malaysia. it was cool but i think it was a waste of money (i.e. tax payers). was supposed to take the bus back to pj but parents decide that they will send me up instead and on the way, stop at ikea. it was jam packed at the mutiara damansara area. then after that went to see aunty peggy in kayu ara. now i know another new place...

all in all, i had a great time in melaka especially with my parents around. adrian was supposed to come back for christmas but couldn't as he was on stand-by. but no worries, he'll be back for chinese new year...yahoo....

makan-makan and melaka

2008-12-23T15:33:00.002+08:00

lately, all i do is work. i dont even have the time to go out to party or dine or drink. well cant go dining cos tak cukup duit la :) i've just been swamped with work and have to do everything by myself as the boss is always not in. she ada-ada saje la her alasans. sick la, repair car la, this la, that la...huh...bosan la with all her alasans. but lately i've been trying to control my temper and try not to be too tension over her. and i guess i managed to control it cos i dont feel as tension or angry as i used to. but still once in a while i'll get irritated la...since the economy is not too good now, guess i wont be switching job anytime soon. i'll just have to take it as it comes la....boo...

guess what?

i'm going back to melaka tomorrow!!! i'll be off from thursday till next monday! this is the longest holiday i've had since i moved to pj.

i'm now sharing the parking spot with my adorable room mate. that spot is actually her brother's housemate's spot but he's back to hometown for a month and will be back end of the month so when he comes back i've to go back to my fucking spot. i told patrick that the fucking-bastard-shit-ccb guard always kacau me and he said he'll try to look for a parking for me but i doubt so la.

oh ya...went to a christmas party at the chapel beside my apartment last saturday. actually doreen from my office invited me. said there will be makan and shows. when i heard the word makan, i told her i'll go la. as usual la. hehe.. the makan was good. i had cha kue teow, mushroom soup, mee jawa and stuffed tauhu. the shows were not so great. there were magic show and ventriloquist and few songs sung by the senior members from other church. i almost fell asleep...especially after having those delicious food...hehe...after that, me and doreen and 2 of her friends went to doreen's place which is in block b. her place was cool and nice. but i felt lost when hanging out with them cos they're all over 40 years old. they were talking about old people stuff la..hehe..so i left early and went to hang out with tigger.

i'm so excited bout tomorrow. cant wait to see my dear mummy and daddy. too bad adrian wont be around, i think.

i hate weak women and gold-digger men!!!

2008-12-10T13:40:00.003+08:00

this past few weeks have been hectic and feels like shit for me. mainly because of that fucking bitch. she's so forgetful, blind (literally!) and a weak woman. the reason why i said she's weak is because she lets her husband control her. even when her husband is angry at her for something, she doesn't stand up for herself. she just keeps quiet. i understand if she wants to remain calm but please la dont let people bully you. she's always with her husband 24/7. of course her husband is like a gold-digger. i feel like he's using her for her money. and the one thing i really hate about him is that he thinks he knows everything. everytime i talk to him, he likes to go against what i said and makes me feel like i'm wrong. please la your english also tak betul and you cant even spell simple words and you wanna pretend to be so highly educated. so that's why lately i dont speak to him as often as i used to. he even had the cheek to ask me to go to jonker walk when i go back melaka during the christmas and buy for him a thing to scratch the back thingy, i dunno what is it called la. puuuiiii..i got no time to buy la. even if i want to then give me money first la...expect me to buy with my own money ah..po dah!!! oh ya, sometimes the wife even burps in front of me and i can actually smell what she had for lunch. tolong la cover sikit la your mouth when you burp..irritating la....

as much as i complain about the 2 bitches, i still plan to work there for at least 1 year or so for the experience. however, my priority for the moment is to look for a plave at the pelangi apartment cos i absolutely HATE staying at my current apartment. mainly because of the fucking security guard. always calls me and say hi or whistle at me. the most frightening was when he stood behind my car when i was parking. bastard, you're not even handsome so please dont act like a mat romeo trying to pikat girls. i've seen some stupid gatal girls have fallen for ur "charm" but i'm not one of them ok. if i know of any samseng or gangster, i would have ask them to come whack you but sadly (and lucky for you) i do not know any. i hope one day, you'll get your balasan. i hope one day, your penis would drop off and someone would come pull your balls till their dangling to the floor. i hope one day your face will be full of jerawat batu. i hope you go to hell. you think just because i'm small in size, i cant do anything is it...dont underestimate me ok. i have something planned to do to you if i ever found a place elsewhere. on the last day of me staying there, i would take my car and go to the guard house and scream at you and curse at you and ask you to go fuck off. then i'll speed up and cabuts.

ok, enough of irritating stories. mum came up last week cos she wants to teman me go back melaka as i told her i wanted to drive. and i was in melaka for 3 days. but i'll have a longer holiday during christmas as i have 5 days leave. yahoo....

2008-11-27T12:45:00.002+08:00

went to ichiban ramen last week with tigger before watching madagascar 2. the movie was off the hook (as prem of fly would say it). it was hilarious.

my brother is giving me his laptop soon as he just bought a new apple macbook. i feel so happy. at last i would have something to do when i'm bored. planning to subscribe to broadband once it get the laptop.

yesterday, me and tigger had our dinner at little penang cafe in the curve. i had asam laksa while tigger had penang nasi lemak. my asam laksa was ok. i still prefer their laksa though. after that we went to watch igor. this is the second animated movie we watch in 2 weeks. it was ok. there are a few very funny parts. i'm going back to melaka next week. cant wait. might drive home. my cfm exam is next tuesday. i'm not nervous. i do study but if this time i cant get through then its the end of icsa for me. i cant afford to sit for the same paper over and over again. and its not even my fault that i fail. the examiners set sucky questions and expect the students to be a super-genius to answer.

my "wonderful" boss is on leave again. this time to port dickson for some church camp thingy for 3 days. they just went to langkawi a couple of weeks back and now outstation again. nowadays i just do my work. i dont bother bout her anymore. since she doesn't care about her company, then please dont expect me to care. this time i'm determined to go after august. thats my target.

boo to all lazy and inconsiderate bosses!!!

of pasar malaming and disgusting "prince charming"

2008-11-18T09:52:00.005+08:00

i wonder what has happen to my brother. his fb and friendster accounts are all gone. seems very very weird. i hope he's ok. i'm just a worried sister.

went to the ss2 pasar malam yesterday and again had a great time as always despite having a difficulty in finding a parking. the fruits they sell over there are so fresh. they even give u test the fruits eventhough u go there every week to buy. the apples are crunchy...unlike the ones they sell at the section 17 pasar malam which tasted like cotton. i hate cotton-y apples. anyway, besides the fruits, the food there is great too. i've tried the popiahs at both the stalls and i prefer the crunchy one which i had yesterday. the chai-tau-keuy was good too although a little different compared to the melaka ones. here they put tau-geh which taste ok but i prefer the melaka ones as they're darker and spicier. the keropok lekor there is also good although i despise the guy selling it cos he always give preference to other customers eventhough i was there first. sheeshh.. but the one thing i hate about the ss2 pasar malam is the frog seller. he sells frog and it looks so disgusting. the first time i saw it, i was wondering what is the greenish-reddish-golden-ish wet-slimy thing this man was selling. and then, i saw the head of the frog and all my bulu stood up! so disgusting! and there were so amny people buying it. i can't imagine people cooking it and eating it. well, i once had frog meat when i was way way younger. me and my family were at a restaurant for a function but i forgot what function and my dad asked me to try this particular fried meat. he told me it was chicken meat so i innocently hantam it. after that, he asked me "nice or not?" and i said it tasted ok la. and then he revealed to me that it was frog meat. after that, i dare not try it anymore. i just have a fear towards frogs and snakes and lizards and all things amphibian. my house has a pond and everytime it rains the frogs will all berkumpul at the pond making this disgusting ong-ong sound and my mum will be the only who catches the frogs and throw them out. of course she uses a net la, not bare-handed. she always asks me to go catch it but i dare not. i hate the sight of them and to even look at them makes me puke. and i don't get the story of the frog and the princess. i mean how can the princess even have the guts to kiss the damn frog... i don't believe that she does not feel disgusted or geli. can be so brave some more..bohong punya princess la...and the frog can turn into a prince charming after being kissed by the princess? yikes!

anyway, enough coverage for something i don't like... i'm going out with tigger today and tomorrow. speaking of him, he says that in the whole malaysia's sakae sushi, he's the only indian staff. i think he should be given more pay la because of that and also because of how hard he works. he takes full shift and never takes leave. he's a harder worker than i am. he deserves more pay la.

i'm still thinking of my plans for next year. it's already mid-november now and almost year-end and i need to start planning for 2009. i need something that will inspire me. '

p/s: looks like my "dear" housemates are not moving out after all :( damn, i was hoping they would berambus. always mengotorkan the house. oh well, i'm planning to bring my small tv back the next time i go back melaka and probably buy a dvd player to kill my boredom staying there, especially after my exam on the 2nd of dec. wish me luck! :D

fly-nniversary

2008-11-17T12:52:00.002+08:00

the weekend came and went by like wind...was studying on saturday while listening to fly fm and the fly-nniversary was at 1u. i was so so tempted to go as there will be performances and stuff. even asked tigger to scold me for wanting to go but instead he asked me to go. so i did. i saw the oh-so-cute hafiz, jules and steve. even saw mooky of one buck short while i was walking around before the party starts. it started at 8pm. it was supposed to start at 7 but i guess there were some problems with the sound system. the opening was the fly peeps in masks doing the stomp. it was so cool. i saw performances by faizal tahir, jacqueline victor, one buck short and estranged. after that, decided to go back as my legs were killing me. it was a great party but i wouldn't say the same for the crowd. it was jam-packed with teenagers. and they were shuffling and pushing around and even threw stuff out. my nose was hit by a stone. poor nose...all in all, i was happy to be able to see hafiz but sadly i went there alone so was not able to take any pics with him :( oh well, better luck next time.

sakae sushi

2008-11-14T10:08:00.003+08:00

had a great time last night (even though it was full of shit during the day). it was tigger's off day yesterday so after my sucky work, we went to sunway pyramid to have dinner at sakae sushi. it was my first dining in a japanese restaurant. now one might wonder why we were there when tigger himself works in sakae sushi in 1u. actually i also dunno la. tigger said he wants to go there so we went la. and he collected the receipts so we wanted to redeem it to a vip card. we had rice with japanese curry, some tauhu thing, some maki, egg custard and some chicken cheese thing, the japanese curry was good. so was the tauhu and maki and egg custard. but the biggest disappointment was the chicken cheese thing. it looked good but it doesn't taste as good as it looks. the chicken was not tender and it tasted like it was not fresh chicken meat. but all in all, we had a great time there. we went back after lepaking for a while as the both of us have work today. now i'm back in this shit-hole.

i'm planning to drive back to melaka in december after my exam to repair the car window and possibly some servicing. then i'm planning to bring back the small tv i have at home so that i wont be bored to death in the apartment. planning to buy a dvd player also. after the exam, i will only have work. after that i'll have no studies to do and can't go out lepak everyday as tigger is working and can't spend a lot of money la. berjimat cermat i must :)

fucking week, fucking days, fucking hours, fucking minutes, fucking moments...

2008-11-13T12:14:00.002+08:00

how many fucking times must i suffer la? i'm like a fucking girl waiting for you everyday so that work can get done but you're either busy going out with your fucking husband or busy uploading fucking pics from langkawi to your fucking blog. and your fucking former staff/bitch-in-heat never ever does her work properly and you still can fucking layan her whenever she calls. some more, all the fucking pending stuff from few years back are all stashed under the fucking table which looked like a fucking pig sty before i started clearing it. did you know that she talked smack about you before she left? fucking not faithful la. i hate to hear her fucking voice whenever she calls the office. she even talked smack about you in her blog but i guess you were too blind to notice it and you have her link in your blog. what the fuck la wey... i deserve more pay for doing her shit ok. i guess i was a bit excited when i heard that she fell off the fucking sink while trying to fix the lights. who ask her to be a stupid fucking shit who stands on a sink. bodoh gila babi. i guess it's a punishment for her la for not doing her job when she was here. some more can go church la and get certificate and all that la.. all bullshit la wey...when people are sincere to God and pray truthfully to them, they don't show off by posting the damn certificate in their blog ok. they don't keep asking God for help for even the smallest fucking thing ok. solve the damn problem yourself la. people who are sincere to God also won't whore themselves out to guys ok. i know you're single but don't go acting like a bitch in heat la. anyway, i'm not here to judge you personal life (eventhough i just did!). i fucking hate you and your fucking former boss. she's not my boss because she doesn't act like one. you and your boss' fucking mess is also affecting my personal life ok. because of the both of you, i have tension which also leads to tension with my fucking lonely life, my eating habits and my relationship. now i know what people from brickfields and sabah act like. i have another 9 more months to go la. i can't fucking wait. these 9 months people can beranak a baby or lead a good life or migrate to somewhere better where their boss treat them with respect and professional ok. but these 9 months, i'm stuck in this shit-hole. but don't worry, i'll dig myself out of this shit-hole and come out a better person. i'm not negative like the both of you ok. fucking shit!

the story of my love life (nothing geli or mushy la)

2008-11-12T10:18:00.004+08:00

since there is no update in my boring life right now, let me tell the story of how tigger and i met. it was in 2003 when we first met. i remember we became friends during the time when we were rehearsing for the marching for merdeka day. i had so much fun talking and joking with him. then he told FV that things will not be "happening" if i'm not around. i got a little excited la. but were still friends that time la. then on the 1st of january 2004, we met up and he said that he doesn't want to be close to me anymore cos he said he he's not a good person and that hanging out with him would ruin my reputation (haha... i didn't even know i had a reputation in that college!). he said that from that time onwards we would just limit ourselves to hi and bye. so i accepted that "request" and went back home and bawled like a baby. i even discussed this with my bro and he said that if a guy does this sort of thing, it means he likes the girl. so, the next few days, whenever he's around i would hide myself either in the class or more often, in the toilet. i was so shy to even look at him in the eye. then i realised that if i really want to be his friend again, i should work towards it and fight for it. so i did. i request to meet up with him and told him that he's not the only one who had done a lot of bad things and i'm not as innocent as i look. it was the most horrifying moment at that time for me. in the end, he said ok and we became friends again. i realised after that that he was much nicer and closer to me after that. then in february, on his birthday, i treated him to rennaisance hotel's buffet lunch and gave him a pair of parker pen as his present. the next day, while we were outside the college talking to a friend, he held my hand for the first time. at that point, i froze. of course la, first time a guy hold my hand ok. and i was so shy i didn't even look at him. we just continued holding hands and talk to that friend. that was the beginning of us. after that, we were always together everywhere. people in the college knew about us but i know some of them dengki and don't like seeing us together.

we had our ups and downs also la. the ones i can remember is the 2 idiots. no point mentioning their name cos they are not worth mentioning. i will feel like as though i'm giving them credit. anyway, those 2 idiots were mentioned earlier in this blog when i wanted to release my anger. besides that we had a lot of small small problems la. then when he went to genting to work, i cried like a baby again la. it was hard not having him around. i remembered a time when he came to melaka to see me then when it was time for him to go back to genting, i cried at the bus station. even the bus driver asked me to follow into the bus. it was really funny la now come to think about it.

the biggest obstacle for us came last year. i can't really mention it here to protect tigger's rep but it was a really bad time for us in august 2007. that was the time i almost tried to commit suiside (which is really stupid, i know) but luckily i didn't. it was a stupid decision on tigger's part to be involved in such a dangerous and serious matter but it all turned out well. he repented and after that, he never really trust people easily. i was also involved with a problem of my own. i call it my rebellious period cos i was hanging out with this bunch of losers who likes to tani all the time. i guess i needed attention. one of them liked me but i came to senses and said i have to stop hanging out with them. so i did and things became much better for the both of us after that. both of us made a bad decision but we came out of it with lessons learned.

i guess we are like husband and wife now. except we don't stay together. we've gone thorugh a lot and i guess nothing can break us up as we've gone through the worst of times and we're still together. our relationship is defined by who we really are. not like the couples we see nowadays. we're comfortable with ourselves and we don't pretend to be someone we're not. i can burp and belch in front of him without feeling shy or embarassed. that's what made us stay together for almost 5 years now. i hope we can be together till the end of time as i can't find anyone else who understands me as much as he does.

there goes the story of my love. thank yous.

a special dedication to my boss

2008-11-11T13:52:00.004+08:00

how many times must i wait patiently for you to come back to the office so that actual work can be done on time? i guess this is the main reason why we always get penalties from ROC and scoldings from clients la. can't you be a bit more professional and start to buck up? why do you have to treat me like this? these are the reasons that made me confirm that i'll quit in august 2009. the reason why it's august is because i wanna help you with the submission of annual return and accounts. see how kind and thoughful i am. but yet, you can't do the same for me. i know you've treated me for lunch many many times, given me food and stuff and even bought for me that "thin", over-sized t-shirt and chocolate from langkawi but i did not request all that from you ok. you wanna belanja me it's your pasal la... it has got nothing to do with why i should be grateful to you ok so please don't give me those excuses when i hand in my resignation letter next year ok. in fact, you should be the one to be grateful to me ok.. cos i've done everything on my part but it was you who are just not bothered about your own company. i know you just got married last year and are probably still in your honeymoon shit but you should place more importance towards your company ok. and about your stalker (or rather your husband's stalker), please la try to handle it with better emotion la. you're already 40-plus but still sometimes act like a child. just tell the stalker off la. why wanna let her ruin your holiday? i know it's none of my business but it's starting to affect me ok cos sometimes stalker will call the office and i have to handle her ok. i got other better things to do than entertain your stalker ok. sheeshhh...

heaven & hell

2008-11-10T11:06:00.002+08:00

had a great time last week despite the fact that it was a full-of-shit week. last friday, tigger was free from afternoon onwards so we planned to meet up after my work. so we went to makan at tgi fridays and the food was good. and then we went back to his place in sg buloh as he wanted to pass some money to his mum. then after that we went to ice bar at the curve. it was freezing cold that we had to wear the jackets which were provided there. the drinks were in a tabung uji instead of a glass. i had bailey's (which to me is a sissy drink, but had to drink it cos tigger ordered that for me..) i guess he didn't want me to get too tipsy as i had to drive back home alone..he had some smirnoff stuff. i'm not pakar in drinks so i'm not sure exactly the name of the drink that he had. anyway, it was a good experience. wouldn't go there again though cos it was damn expensive for such a small tabung uji.

work is starting to piss me off. ms boss is a very (emphasise on the VERY) forgetful person. she sometimes forget to write the date or sign on the cheque that she's issuing. i mean, how can you be so silly as to forget such a simple thing. she always kena marah from her client cos of her forgetfull-ness. sometimes, i also kena marah from the client cos of her. besides that, she always come in late for work. sometimes, at 11 something or worst, 2pm. if she comes in late, i cant get a lot of things done as i need her signature or her advice. i know i can call her but i prefer to speak to her face-to-face so that i can get clear message and instructions from her. oh ya, one more thing, marital problems are displayed in front of me. hello, boss & husband, you all not shy ah fight and argue in front of me? you not shy but i shy leh... everytime they argue, i have to pretend to do my work and ignore them. that time more work will be delayed and in the end it'll be my fault for not doing the work on time. isshhh...damn geram la... be professional a bit la. leave your marital problems at home and just concentrate on your work (and memory!) in the office la..

i've already set my mind that i'll work till august next year. the reason is to get that 1 year experience and then i'll chow...since in most job vacancies need at least 1 year experience. i can't stay in this job for too long. it'l eventually de-motivate me and i'll go crazy...

2008-11-05T09:43:00.003+08:00

went to watch "the coffin" yesterday with tigger at cineleisure last night. it was an ok horror movie. it was scary in the beginning but after that it was not scary at all. in fact it was more of a love story and the message of not to interrupt the cycle of life. the story is about these 2 person who went through a ritual in thailand of lying in a coffin and go through the funeral ceremony in order to get ride of bad karma. they got ride of it but some paranormal shit started to happen after the ritual. it was an ok movie la. the main actors are ananda everingham from "the shutter" and karen mok. "the shutter" was much scarier and better than this movie. but i had a great time watching any movie no matter how sucky they are as long as tigger's with me :)

my wish to my beloved brother:
-i wish you wont feel lonely or sad
-i wish you will feel happy and be safe all the time
-i wish you have a problem-free life
-i wish you are always happy with whoever you're with
-i wish you would quit smoking completely because i want you to live longer than me
-i wish everything good would happen to you
-i wish you would be closer to me and mummy and daddy and tell us everything you're going through so that we can understand you better and share whatever you're going through
-last but not least, i wish you always have a smile wherever you go and whatever you do...

deepavali, family, AGM and future.

2008-10-30T12:33:00.003+08:00

had a blast last week...went back home to my good ol' melaka for deepavali. adrian came back too so it was great. we hardly spend time together as he is always busy with work so it was good to have everyone back home. went to grandpa's shop on sunday to makan laksa and then went to patti's house to help her with the mutton and vege and everything..uncle danny's son, cayden, is just so adorable..he's already 13 months old..how time flies...then on deepavali, aunty pat and her family came..so did ku-ku and uncle gary..and also uncle danny's in-laws..i was supposed to go back on tuesday with sara but adrian said he has to go back on deepavali day itself so i decided to follow him. i was so sad leaving mummy and daddy. almost want to cry but i tried my best to control..i know mummy is having stress with her work and all..i feel so sad..i promise i'll work hard and get enough money so that both of them no need to work anymore. i know it'll take quite some time but i'll try my best.

i went to my first AGM last friday with ms boss at the royal lake club at taman tasik perdana. i'll make it short. it's boring.

yesterday was tigger's sister's 21st birthday and they had a small party for her in their house. some of the relatives came. i had a lot of fun even though 90% of the time i dont know what they're talking. i hope tigger knows that he has a very nice family.

was talking to tigger the other day bout our future and then came the idea that it's better for me to work in this company till august 2009 and then go look for a better job with higher salary. i know it's like kacang lupakan kulit if i just leave after 1 year but i have no choice. i dont feel like i'm progressing here and i want something challenging with more money :D

surprise!!!

2008-09-29T08:44:00.015+08:00

anjali

kareena

jacob

from left: sarah, kareena, jacob(front), anjali(back) and ah hui

the cuties...

the surprise party went well. well, not at first though. on friday, i reached puduraya at about 7pm and found out at the counter that my bus venue was changed to bukit jalil. and when i told the guy that the lady who sold me the ticket said to wait in puduraya, he said "kalau u nak complain, pergi le complain". i didn't want to make a big scene so i left and took the shuttle bus to bukit jalil. reached there at about 7.45pm and waited there till about 8.30pm. and the bus driver said whether its 6.30 or 7.30 or 8.30 bus, all would have to go up that particular bus. so i quickly went up just to make sure i get a seat. while all the tension mounts up on me, a malay guy was even flirting with me. i didn't have the mood to scold him so i just ignored him. reached melaka about 10.45pm. the place was packed with cars near sentral. put up at andrea's place. the next morning, andrea brought me to eat roti canai for breakfast. then we went italy bakery in melaka raya to order the cake. andrea gave me the idea that i buy 2 cakes, one for mum and one for dad. so we ordered 2 cakes. told them that we'll come take it at 5pm. then we went to carrefour at dataran to buy drinks, serviets, forks and spoons. then we went to eat my favourite wan tan mee near the place where i used to work. it was lovely. even the wan tan mee aunty still remembers me. then met up with andrea's juniors and raymond. hung out till 6pm then me, raymond and andrea went back to her house. upon reaching there, we remembered that we have not taken the cakes! yikes! so raymond being the kind soul went to take them. about 7pm, aunty pat told me that they have already brought my parents to their house. so we quickly went to my house and prepared. and then at about 7.30pm, aunty pat asked me whether are we ready cos my parents were getting a little restless and they are out of idea in stalling them. so i told her we need just a little more time and asked her to fake having a stomach ache and wants to use the toilet for a while. luckily raymond came just on time. so i told aunty pat to come now. i was so nervous i was sweating like mad. when they arrived, they were really surprised. my mum thought something happened to our house as it was all open and with so many people. the look on their face was priceless. they were so happy and smiling all the way. i was happy to see them so happy. we had a great time. funny thing was aunty pat didn't tell them what was the occassion so they thought she was bringing them out for her anniversarry or birthday. they even bought a cake for aunty pat! almost everyone i invited from aikido came and also aunty melissa and aunty lynn. all of us had a great time. thanks so much to raymond, andrea and everyone who attended but most of all, big big thanks to aunty pat, uncle mike and june for their A-plus effort.

i tumpang sara to come back to damansara yesterday. felt so sad to leave my parents again. gonna miss them so much. but i'll be back for deepavali on the last week of october so am looking forward to going back to be with them again.

all in all, great weekend. the only one missing is adrian as he's very busy with work.. hope the four of us can get together again.

yay...yay...yay...

2008-09-26T08:43:00.002+08:00

i'll be going back to good ol' melaka today. am soooo excited and can't really sleep last night. yesterday after work, sent tigger to his aunt's place as he'll be staying there. the curve is just so very near to his aunt's place so thats why he'll be staying there. today will be his first day at work so fingers crossed and good luck.

yesterday, i called kim of aikido to comfirm with her the food and persons coming. and she told me that richard of aikido told joseph about the party and joseph called chua and asked why he wasn't invited. so chua just ask him to come. eeyer...tak tau malu people..go and invite himself. this is my party so i can invite whoever the hell i want. so i told kim it's ok he can come. and since joseph is coming, i terpaksa invite gopal, his bestie la. but i strictly told gopal that i did not invite iqbal so don't go telling him that there is a party at my house. so he said ok. and i terpaksa tell him that i couldn't inform him earlier as i don't have his number and it sounded like he smirked at me on the phone. dunno la whether really or its just my imagination. hehe..anyway, wth...

i hope tomorrow will be a good and fun day. can't believe it's really happening...tata...

yay...will be in melaka tomorrow..

2008-09-25T09:55:00.002+08:00

will be going back to melaka tomorrow. am so very overly excited. andrea called last night to confirm that i'll be putting up at her place. heard that sara might come for the party too...double yay... tried calling rileen's mum but no one answered so i gave up.

these few days have been hectic. turned out that the former employee didn't do her work properly. so many queries from roc for the past few years have not been answered. bitch left the whole bunch stacked under the table. now i have to do all the things that she didn't do. and ms boss didn't even blame her. still can talk to her nicely on the phone whenever she calls and care about her. and here i am, cleaning up her damn ass!!! before she left, she told me so many bad stuff about boss and her husband and said she's fed up with them and that's why she left. but after she left, she still calls the office to chat with boss. i mean, wtf...stupid bitch...

good news is tigger got a job in sakae sushi restaurant in the curve. so he'll be staying in his aunt's place in kota damansara. so more reasons for me to go there during the weekends. hehehe...he'll be starting tomorrow.

random pics

2008-09-23T09:18:00.013+08:00

when i first moved to pj, tigger, his mum and sis brought me out. so nice of them.

mummy doing her line dance. this shot was taken when i came back for the first time to melaka during merdeka.

me in office.

me with siew chin when i came back. we went satay celup-ing.

me and andrea.

ah hui in aikido. something very disturbing behind her.

spaghetti which i made last night. actually the sauce was made by mummy. i made the spaghetti.

my leftover vege chicken curry and fried egg.

now you see it...

now you dont...hehe..

another 3 days till my going back to melaka. cant wait. just too excited. kim of aikido called me yesterday and said that they've planned what food each of them will bring. wong sms-ed me the other day saying that he'll come. my aikido people are the best. they're a very supportive bunch of people and they like to have fun and not gossip unlike "some" groups. anyway hope everything goes on well.

4 days and 5 days...(today is daddy's birthday)

2008-09-22T09:20:00.004+08:00

it had been a great weekend. went to tigger's place on saturday to bring his sister to cheras as she wanted to bring back some books from her hostel. after that, we went to the curve and ikea. had our lunch in little penang cafe and i ordered laksa while tigger and shangkari ordered nasi lemak. my laksa was fantastic...although not as fantastic as my dad's but it was worth it. the pulut hitam was good too. the total bill was less than rm50 for 3 person... compared to chilli's which was rm70+ for 2 person. i then bought some books from borders...to expand my agatha christie collection...overall, we had fun on that day...then later that night, tigger's mum cooked prawn curry which were so good...

another 4 more days till i go back to melaka and 5 days before the party. time passes so fast and i just can't wait for this week. don't really know what's gonna happen on that day...fingers crossed that everything will go on well...

missing mummy, daddy and adrian...

2008-09-19T10:09:00.004+08:00

mrs bean will be going back to her hometown today...which means she wont be back at all after this...except to take back her other stuff like her table, "cupboard"...which means i'm free at last!...i'm not sure whether the new girl wants to move into my room or not...i dont mind actually cos she's ok...

been doing some research on migrating to australia. found out that i actually have the required points to go there! so my next step is to get in contact with either my uncle who lives there or probably find an agent.

another 1 more week to go before i step foot on my beloved melaka and 8 days before the party. can't wait. this weekend, might cook some food and also co-ordinate my room since mrs bean is no longer here. then might go to tesco to buy some stuff and just relax...see first la...

8 days to go bebeh...

2008-09-18T09:37:00.003+08:00

i just can't wait for the day to come...in exactly 8 days, i'll be going to melaka...my parents not knowing that i'm coming back...and the surprise partyy...oh..all of these just makes me sooo excited...will be calling rileen's mum next week...and will be staying over at andrea's place next friday...

on a lighter note...mrs bean will be going back to her hometown tomorrow..yipeee...although i've said that i was beginning to like her, but after that day she went back to her normal self...singing out loud and being quiet like a freak...so yipee that she's not going to be here anymore...

work has been a bit boring...but miss boss is nice...i know she yearns for a baby but i've heard that it's not easy for her to get one as she had some health problem...pity her...i hope she'll get what she wish for...soon...

my first real cooking...

2008-09-15T08:52:00.003+08:00

presenting...my first ever vegetarian chicken curry...

it was my first ever attempt at cooking the vegetarian chicken curry and i must say it tasted quite nice..at least eat-able (i.e. edible) la...was so happy about it...

mrs bean and me chatted on saturday and this time she spoke a lot to me...she said she'll be moving out next month as she is going to taiwan to further her studies. which means i get to continue staying at the balcony room...yay...she talked about her family and her studies and her dreams and her daily life as a student...and she even asked about me...just when i'm beginning to like her, she decides to move out....haiii...we chatted from 2.30 to about 6pm...quite a long chat...and i realised after chatting with me, she had become a bit more considerate and thoughtful...at least i think la...she blow dry her hair outside when i'm sleeping..not like previously where she does everything when i'm asleep...can't belive i'm saying this...sad to see her leaving...

i called aunty pat on saturday and she said that mummy had confirmed that she and daddy will be "going out" with aunty pat. she said the plan is to bring them to her house and then when we're all ready, i'll give her a call and she'll pretend that they'll have to pick "someone" up at ozana and then voila...aunty pat is just so amazing..can think of this idea for me...

also called aunty lynn and she said she'll be able to make it...so now everything's settled on the part of the guests...the only thing left now is the cake and drinks. i've bought the bus tickets and luckily it was not sold out...so yay to everything being according to plan...

this wednesday is a public holiday for selangor so yay again..he he...

yay...

2008-09-12T08:52:00.004+08:00

i cooked noodle soup last night. my mummy's version. and it tasted almost like hers but i'm excited cos I cooked my dinner by MYSELF, instead of just heating food that mummy gave me...i'm so proud of myself...he he he...

on a very happy note, aunty pat called me last night and told me that she had already ask my mummy out on her birthday. but mummy said she'll confirm with her today. i wonder, why does she need to think about it? is it because she might have other plans? i just hope she'll say yes. *fingers crossed* anyway, aunty pat has been very supportive and VERY helpful regarding this surprise party. i will buy her a baskin robbins ice cream since she once said that she wants me to buy her one...she truly is my mum's best friend. she's been my mum's friend for over 30 years and that kind of friendship is very difficult to find these days. after speaking to her on the phone, i was so excited i couldn't sleep. but it was made even worst when mrs bean still hasn't close the balcony door at 11 something and i had mosquito bits all over my body *sial* nowadays, i don't even bother whether she's in the room or not. i just do my own stuff and pretend that she's not there.

eh, lari topic pula...my next target is to call aunty lynn and aunty melissa. hope they can make it...

because of my obsession with the notebook *the book and the movie*, i've grown to love the soundtrack of the movie. i need to get hold of the dvd as i've only seen snipets of the movie on youtube. when i hear the soundtrack, it reminds me of tigger and my family. i miss all of them so much. i've been alone for 2 months now (except for the few times where i meet tigger) and i just miss melaka so much. right now, i feel like i'm still not achieving anything to make me happy. i know this job is only temporary. i've decided that i'll work here for a year and then try again to see whether this time i can go to australia. i want to have something to do with books. i know my destiny is with books, not chartered secretary or law although studying those 2 courses did help me to re-discover my love for books. i've love reading ever since i was a child and i couldn't stop even when i'm grown up. so i know thats my destiny. the only thing is i don't know how to get into this industry...

helppp...

2008-09-11T09:49:00.002+08:00

i'm obsessed with the notebook! i can't believe that after i've finished reading it few days ago, i'm still thinking and obsessing about it. help me...

2008-09-10T10:17:00.002+08:00

aarghhh...my landlord ffk-ed us...again! told me and sin ying that he'll come fix the lights but didn't come. mrs bean said that he's always like this. always promising to fix something but either few months late or totally ignore everything. i guess people nowadays are like that. tell us nice things before we move in and after that...gone...

newbie talked to me a bit last night. said she start work at 7.30am and finish at about 8pm!!!she's just amazing. i couldn't do that if i were in her position. and she said she always have biscuits for dinner. i pity her. furthermore, her room mate, sin ying, sometimes sleeps at about 1-2am. even worse than mrs bean. but at least sin ying studies in her room and doesn't make any noise. unlike mrs bean.

can't wait for 26th to come when i go back to melaka. 16 days to go... will be buying bus ticket this saturday. tigger's in jb with his mum and bro so i don't have any plans with him :( i've to call aunty pat soon to ask her about the surprise plans. hope she remembers. i hope the aikido members will come.

speaking of aikido, i might go to the aikido centre near my place this friday to check them out. it's stated that the classes are on monday, wednesday and friday.

chilli's!!!

2008-09-09T08:59:00.008+08:00

miss my home... (thats monk on the telly)

dear tigger in chilli's

me in chilli's

had a great weekend last week. went over to tigger's place and on saturday we went to chilli's in klcc. i ordered tequila-lime fish and tigger had chicken taco with rice and beans. the food was great but sadly can't say the same for the drinks. i ordered hot tea as i had cold and flu and guess what...it wasn't hot at all. not even warm...anyways, the food was worth it and MIGHT go there again. the reason why i said might was because when we arrived there, the waiter asked me whether i'm a muslim because i look like a malay. it seems they're not allowed to serve food to the muslims as it is the fasting month. i didn't want to argue much so i just said a simple no...just because i don't look like a typical chinese doesn't mean i'm automatically a malay...i just hate it when people instantly assume i'm a malay. especially during the puasa month...

i still can't move in to the other room..the landlord still hasn't come to fix the damn light. he said he would come yesterday but he didn't. i can't stand staying with mrs bean no more...she turn on the music loud even when she's studying. she taps her feet on the floor loudly. she sings out loud when i'm trying to sleep. sometimes i don't know whether she does it on purpose to irritate me. it's just so annoying. i don't know why she does what she does.

read the notebook over the weekend and i just love the storyline...it's so heart-wrenching and i cried several times while reading the book. before this, i've heard that this is a sad love story but i didn't know it would be this sad and touching...i'll definitely read it again and again...

i've been thinking, since i love reading so much, my next target is to open my own book store. no selling stationeries and stuff. just strictly books. either selling or renting. that would be nice...would do some research on it soon.

my anger...you bloody f*cker..

2008-09-05T13:52:00.003+08:00

had this idiot-bastard-shitfaced client who called up and scolded me on the phone. screamed at me and didn't give me a chance to defend myself. and the worst thing was he slammed the phone while i was talking...that was the worst! no, worst still, it was not our fault. it was his own bloody fault but blamed it on us. ccbknnlc!!! curse u and ur stupid company JNIMC... even ur bloody ASS-istant is no bloody good. he's able to follow u around like a dog but the both of u can rot in hell.

dei parameswaran nachiappan! just because your name means lord shiva in tamil, but u're the exact opposite of a god...in fact u're not human at all...not even an animal..u're a devil aka setan!!! u don't deserve to live in this world.. u're better off living in a cage instead of those poor animals. pour hot water on u and see how it feels. thats exactly how i felt when u spoke rudely to me. on fine day, u'll get the appropriate balasan. u think u've ruined my day but u're wrong. i'm stronger now and know how to handle people like u. if u're in front of me now, i'll use my fist to do the talking...just because u're a man doesn't mean u can bully me...i'm much more stronger than u bloody old man... i have all ur personal details ok..so don't mess with me...

there...i'm done!

"err...i...have...to...ask...uncle...to...come...fix...the...light...first...

2008-09-05T09:04:00.003+08:00

mrs bean came back yesterday and i asked her is it ok if we switch rooms. she said ok and in her mind it's already set that she wants the balcony room. so me being kind and generous just agreed la. can't really argue with this spoiled kid. anyway, i heard her pc got jammed cos of too much downloading...(he he he *laughing in silent*) personally i think i cursed the pc...he he.. anyway when i went to pay the rent to my landlord, he said that the single room is very very small. so there goes my dream of living alone. he will fix the lights in my room today and we will switch rooms this sunday cos apparently sin ying can't study in a dim-litted room. anyway, i'm just gonna let it be and not hold any grudge. i'm old enough to not start any arguments or fights with anyone.

i had mummy's asam fish last night for dinner...it was good...yum yum...will be staying over at tigger's place today and the weekends. another 3 weeks till my parents' surprise party...can't wait...

i cooked...for the first time here..

2008-09-04T08:47:00.003+08:00

had a GREAT dinner last night. well, actually cos i cooked!!! i cooked rice and steamed the can tuna curry in the steamer. although it was simple but for me it was worth it. i feel happy after eating and was very joyful. tonight i'm eating rice with mummy's asam fish...yay!!! even more happiness and joy for me...

on a lousy note, i just knew it that mrs bean would want to remain in the balcony room if she were to move in with sin ying. this morning sin ying told me that she called mrs bean and she said she's ok with the moving in thingy but wants to remain in the balcony room. so i said ok, sadly. come to think of it, i think i don't mind la moving in with newbie. suffer now, comfort later. maybe she might be way better than mrs bean. fingers crossed...

boring post..

2008-09-03T09:11:00.002+08:00

yesterday was not good. had flu and a little sore throat. didn't have much work yesterday. in short, everything was boring. this weekend, will bring tigger to klcc makan at chilli's and movie and also to buy my ipanema sandal by the supermodel gissele bundchen. then might go find out more on the aikido thing near my place. then might go buy some groceries. can't wait for the weekends to come. i need my peoples...

i'm back in hell...

2008-09-02T09:00:00.004+08:00

had a wonderful weekend...truly wonderful...
fri, 29th aug- reached melaka at about 9pm. found out that my dad traded in his wira and bought a new savvy. then met up with aikido members in newton.

sat, 30th aug- met up with some friends. had satay celup and bought some stuff in tan kim hock for tigger and ms boss.

sun, 31st aug- was at my grandpa's shop but was not able to eat the laksa as i had sore throat. went to tesco with mum, patti and geetha. mum bought so much of things for me. i just feel so lucky to have her in my life. then went for aikido in the evening. managed to give the surprise party invitation card to some of them. mum cooked an amazing dinner. she even cooked some of her signature dishes and freez it so i can bring up to pj and can heat it and makan anytime i want. thank u mummy... watched made of honour with mum and dad till i fell asleep.

mon, 1st sept- followed mum to bkt serindit for jogging. met aunty pat there and told her of the party. she said she's able to help me. then at about 1.20pm, left melaka for cyberjaya to see adrian. his condo is so nice and luxurious. he gave me a bottle of green tea perfume from l'occitane. then he brought us to restaurant uno for dinner. me and dad had spaghetti, he and mum had pizza. had a wonderful time with them the whole day. then it was time for me to go back to hell. i cried after they left. i just miss them so much and i love the times we've spent together. i wouldn't trade it for anything at all.

new girl moved in to the other room. then bean2 called for a meeting and discussed about how are we suppose to pay for electricity since we're working people and do not have pc. then the other girl also suggested that i move in with newbie while mrs bean and sin ying can move in together. i don't mind moving in with newbie but i want my room as it has the balcony. the other room doesn't have balcony nor window. newbie said it's up to mrs bean and sin ying to decide as they've been there longer. she even told me that she's seen the single room and it's very small and can only fit a bed. now i'm worried. i think once my cheque is cleared, i'll go see the landlord, pay him the rent and ask to see the single room. i hope it's not as small as what newbie said.

headache...headache...from now on, i'm planning to just get out of the apartment during the weekends and go for holidays. i can't think if i'm in hell. i need to just stay away from the apartment during the weekends.

hooray hooray yahoo yahoo!!!

2008-08-29T08:30:00.002+08:00

i'm going back today!!! as if it's something surprising. couldn't really sleep well as expected. at about 8 something or 9pm, this girl came to my apartment saying that she's moving in next monday and were there so have a look at her room. she's going to move into sin ying's room. she's a working girl but she speaks chinese so i don't think i can hang out much with her. i feel happy today and for the rest of the weekend! have to really try to find out how to inform the guests on the surprise birthday party. as i'm not driving my car back, i'll have to find an alternative way to get around. hope everything turns out well.

tomorrow is the day!!!

2008-08-28T08:53:00.003+08:00

had a good dinner last night. at first i thought i had to eat magee again as i don't have much cash. but the "leader" of the apartment ie bean2, asked me whether i want to eat dinner as she was cooking so i said ok. she cooked fried fish, seaweed soup, potato ketchup and some fried dumpling thingy. it was surprisingly good. it was only me, bean2 and sin ying. mrs bean had gone back hometown and i didn't know where were the rest last night. we didn't talk much. bean2 just asked whether the food was good and whether i was full. sin ying didn't speak as usual.

i can't believe i'll be in melaka tomorrow! i just can't wait. i might not be able to sleep tonight probably due to over-excitement. the thing that i'm most afraid is the rain. it's been raining very heavily for the past few days. i just hope everything goes on well tomorrow...fingers crossed :D

of dsai, food and melaka!

2008-08-27T09:17:00.003+08:00

today is a good day..found out that datuk seri anwar ibrahim won the by-election in permatang pauh. he won by a majority of 15671 votes, much more than when his wife contested during the march 8 election! it clearly shows that the people want major changes in malaysia and that they're fed-up with all the rasuahs, sodomy and all the nonsense thats been going on in the past few years. i hope dsai will be able to keep up with his promises like harga minyak turun, equality among various races,etc. if he can do it, then it shows that he is in fact capable to lead the country without any dirty tricks.

without including today, there'll be 2 more days before i'm officially back home! i'm just so super excited! i can't wait to eat laksa, noodle soup, mee rebus, roti john, wan tan mee, yong tau foo, char kuey teow, satay celup, chicken rice!, and all the delicious food in melaka! thinking about it makes me so hungrrry now...

got to know from my mummy that next tuesday is a public holiday for melaka for the puasa thingy. asked a few peoples here whether its a public holiday in selangor and the answer is a big fat NO! lousy place! if i didn't hear wrongly, ms boss said she'll let me off at 4.30pm this friday cos she thought i'll be driving back. yahoo to me. if like that then i'll be able to reach mlk early. double yahoo!

vitamin and chicken rice

2008-08-26T09:02:00.003+08:00

yesterday ms boss asked me to follow her and her husband for lunch. i couldn't think of an alasan to avoid their offer so i accepted. we went to section 17 nearby my place and had chicken rice. while we were eating she asked about my health and i said i'm easily affected by dirty food. so after lunch, they stopped at a nearby pharmacy and bought some vitamins and even bought for me a garlic oil supplement. i offered to pay but they didn't want to accept. they're just too nice and i cannot tahan people who are too nice to me la. so i've made a decision to stop accepting their offers and try my best to come up with various alasans to avoid their lunch offers. when i go back this friday (3 more days to go...yay!!!) i'll ask mum to bake something for them and also give them some kaya or something. just to balas balik la. i know the only right thing is to treat them to lunch when i get my pay but i can't afford to waste my money la. i need it for my own expenses and also for my savings. so the next best thing to do is to bring some stuff from melaka and give it to them la. like that, i don't need to spend a lot of money and it's also considered as pay back la. aiyo...so susah la...

4...4...4...more days to go!!!

2008-08-25T08:51:00.006+08:00

the aikido plan tak jadi though i was silently wishing it did jadi. went to dear tigger's house instead over the weekend. i know i've said that i can't go there since i don't have much money for petrol but i just need to get out of that apartment. we were supposed to go to jusco kepong on saturday night but it was jam halfway through so we cancelled our plan. i guess the jam was partly due to the small decrease in petrol price. anyway on sunday, we went to cheras to bring his sister back. before going back to sungai buloh, we stopped at brickfields and had nasi briyani for lunch. upon finishing my rice, i had this very very bad stomach ache. it felt almost like someone is poking a sharp knife into my stomach and i was sweating even though it was so cold due to rain. and then i felt like vomitting and so they had to stop at the nearby petrol station. and true enough, every bit of the nasi briyani came out. immediatly after that, i felt so so much better. tigger said it might be because of the oil in the nasi briyani. at the moment, i really hate the food in kl. i'm glad i'll be able to cook on my own soon. since i've moved here, i've gotten sick so many times i can't be bothered to count.

mrs bean will be having her study break for 2 weeks and she'll be going back to her hometown this week. and then she'll be sitting for her exams in september and have 3 months holiday. which means she'll be back end of the year or next year. (no comment!...joy in silent...)

i failed my finance paper but passed my secretaryship with merit. now, i have only that finance paper to resit and i'm done. goodness gracious...if only i passed that finance paper then there is not need to sit for anymore exams...

can't wait to go back...can't wait to go back...can't wait to go back...

7 days i.e. 1 weeeeekkk....

2008-08-22T09:03:00.003+08:00

i cleaned the mighty dirty toilet yesterday and mop my side of the room and am feeling a little comfortable now. at least i dun feel yucky but i do hope that they'll maintain it... oh what the hell am i talking... of course they wont maintain it! i'll be the one cleaning it every week. gosh...what a life..

work is progressing quite well. i learned a lot from ms boss. she always teach me stuff but sometimes i wish she'll give me work in the morning or after lunch instead of 1 hour before 5.30pm. i need to go back to rest yo...

i think...

2008-08-21T08:55:00.004+08:00

i think...i might not be moving to the other room after all. i've given it some thought and concluded that i do not want to move there. the reason being... my bill for this month was rm10 which is the cheapest i can get. i do not know what "special rate" the other apartment might offer me cos in the other room i was thinking of bringing a tv and that might just up my bills. so i just need to suffer for 2 years just to save on bills and stuff. as one of my motto is "suffer now, comfort later" (tee hee), i'll just have to shut up and go on with my life.

p/s: oh ya...8 days to go!!!

p/ss: change of plan with the rileen's mum thingy. i'm planning to ask aunty pat instead to bring them out on the surprise day. hope she says yes...

9 days to go..

2008-08-20T08:57:00.002+08:00

dad called last night and told me about the possibility of few of the aikido members coming up to kl for a training session this sunday.i'm so excited to be seeing at least a few familiar faces from melaka but it's not confirm yet.he said he would update me about it.i hope it goes according to the plan then at least i have something to do this weekend.

dad also told me that they've already bought a rice cooker for me.thank you mummy and daddy.once i get it,i won't need to waste money buying yucky food from the shops.

my surprise party is going on surprisingly well.i've bought the cards to be given to the guests.i'm so excited about it.these things keeps me sane especially with all the problems in the apartment.at least i have something to do to keep my mind away from the problems.

uti

2008-08-18T16:29:00.001+08:00

i was feeling unwell last friday at about 5 in the morning. it lasted the whole morning and finally i couldn't take it so told the Boss that i wanted to go back at 1pm. as soon as i left, i went to dear tigger's place and he brougth me to the clinic. turns out, i have the urinary tract infection...again. second time this year but the first one was much more worst than this. so the weekend was practically spent at home while tigger cooked for me. thanks ya dear for taking care of me. 'll treat you to a movie date and makan at chilli's at klcc on the 13th of sept for your being a graduate.

i couldn't believe it! another 10 days and i'm back to my sweet heaven!!! i'm counting the days and am just so excited! i've still a lot to do with regards to my surprise party. as soon as i'm back next week i've to meet so many people to inform about the party. in total there are about 18-19 guests and i'm so excited.

this weekend might be a boring one as i'll not be going anywhere. i don't have enough money to spend so am just waiting for pay day...

i'm moving...

2008-08-13T08:42:00.003+08:00

i'm moving out of the god-forsaken block and might be moving into block b. i asked my landlord whether there is any available single room and he said it'll only be available towards the end of september. so i told him i want that room. he asked me whether there are any problems with my current room mate or house mates but i just told him i'd just like some privacy. so he said he'll inform me once the girl in the single room moves out. yay!!! i'm so happy for the first time since i was here. can't wait for the day i finally move out.

there are a few changes as to the surprise party. i might ask the guests to bring their own food, pot luck style. the reason is because i cant manage to go prepare the food as i'm in pj. i'll only be back the day before the surprise day so i don't have much time to prepare the food. i've also asked andrea and she said i can put up at her place the night before. so everything's going on pretty well. the only thing left is to inform the guests and the plan with rileen's mum. need to get her number. hope my plan will be a success! :D

dirty unsexy ass! (in connection with the show"dirty sexy money")

2008-08-12T08:36:00.004+08:00

last night was not a good night for me.first of all, i was out for a while and when i got back, i found out that someone took a crap in the toilet and did not flush!!! it was so horrible and disgusting. i mean, they are girls but couldn't behave like one. i just hate when girls do that. it's excusable for guys but ah...i just couldn't believe it. the culprit might be my mrs bean cos she was the only one in the apartment. but i just kept it to myself. disgusting people. i just feel like running away from that place. i need to stay there for 6 months in order to get back my deposit. i really don't know what to do.
then later that night, i was about to sleep and the 3 kecoh girls came back and made so much of noise that i just couldn't sleep. argghhh.....i couldn't take it! furthermore my mrs bean refuse to switch off the lights when she saw me lying down almost going to dreamland. she continued doing nonsense on her computer. i mean please be considerate la. i'm working ok. i need to sleep early and wake up early in order to be the first to use the toilet in the morning. i'm living with a bunch of aliens! this made me miss my home even more. cos my home is super super clean and super super quiet. august 29th...please come faster!!!

missing everything

2008-08-11T15:09:00.005+08:00

the weekends were so blah...used the public transport to go to kl on saturday and it wasn't exciting at all. didn't have fun at all. my mrs bean was not in her room for over 4 days already. guess she either went back hometown or put up at a friend's place. anyway, i'm not bothered. might be staying over at dear tigger's place this weekend so am looking forward to it. i need to meet real human after a week of alien association..he he...
anyway, i developing a new hobby to pass my time in this ufo-esque place. its doing research on absolutely anything. right now, my first research would be on the lina joy's case. anything to pass my time huh...blah...

p/s: i miss my mummy, my daddy, my ti ti and my dear tigger :(
p/ss: i miss my house and especially my room...
p/sss: i miss my tv time...

uninteresting week

2008-08-08T09:12:00.005+08:00

got back at about almost 10pm the other day cos have to settle all the companies annual return as it was the last day to submit it to roc. actually finish at about 8 something but then have to send boss back near 1 utama cos her husband went back early. before that she belanja me makan roti naan and tandoori chicken near her place. this week will not be nice for me cos i'll be by myself. can't even go to dear tigger's house cos he's teman-ing his mum and brother go to johor as his bro got a new job there. the only interesting thing happening this week is that i might be meeting andrea this coming sunday. but i've to try to take the bus though cos i don't know how to drive to kl. scared i might get lost. right now, i only know how to go to sg buloh, 1 utama and possibly damansara utama. my life during the weekdays would be:
1) going to work
2) go back after work
3) eat my dinner
4) sleep
help! i need my people...i miss my family...i wanna go back ozana impian...i wanna see dear tigger...

my plan to surprise my parents with a birthday party is going on well. i've planned how to go back, how to get the keys, where to stay when i go back the day before and who to invite. the planning stage is going on well la. the execution might be tougher than i think. but hope everything goes well...

ta ta for now. have to work :(

of boredom and party!

2008-08-06T09:30:00.006+08:00

i feel bored staying in that apartment. there's just nothing to do and no one to hang out with. no one to chat with. the only "activity" i do there is to wash my clothes and read magazines. what a lousy life. although i know how to go to 1 utama, i don't want to hang out by myself. i'm only waiting for the weekends to arrive so that i can spend time with dear tigger. however this weekend's plans are not confirmed as he might need to follow his brother to johor for 2 weeks. so i'm keeping my fingers crossed and hope that i'm able to see him. speaking of dear tigger, he passed all his papers and the only thing left is training for 4 months and then voila! a graduate! congrats dear. i know i've said i'll belanja you makan for the previous exam but still not yet. dont worry. i'll belanja you big time this time since i'm here. i'm so proud of you...my boy is almost a graduate!!!

i'm planning to have a surprise birthday party for my parents next month. i need to ask my patti to cook as i cant cook. i will invite some of their closest friends over to our house. i hope they'll like it. i'm so excited about it and am already planning for the invitation list and everything. i just want to show them that i appreciate everything they have done for me. i miss them so much.

i wanna go back home!!!

what a beany week...

2008-08-04T12:00:00.003+08:00

it's only been a week living in damansara and lots of things have occured. i've learnt a lot from my boss and she and her husband are very nice people. sadly, i cant say the same for my apartment. my room mate is a total anti social. i call her mrs bean as i cant recall her name. the other housemates are also anti social. they just dont talk to me. the toilet is not maintained properly. i felt so disgusted to even put my toiletries there. dear suren was very kind to bring me out. he showed me how to go to 1 utama from my place and also how to go to his place. on friday i straight went to sg buloh after work and i managed to reach there without any difficulty. however on sunday, before i left to go back home we had an argument and i ended up going back full with anger. as a result of that i almost got lost twice. i was so devastated and for a moment thought of just staying away from him cos i didnt want to torture him any further. i have a very bad attitude problem and it took a toll on our relationship. i felt so bad for making him suffer. anyway, i apologised this morning and everything is ok now. i'll try my best to change and be the best girlfriend for him.

new life soon...

2008-07-22T13:31:00.004+08:00

i went for a job interview last thursday for the post of company secretarial assistant in pj and they hired me on the spot. i'll start work next monday and i'm quite excited. the reason why i'm only 'quite' excited is because i'm leaving my family here to go live and work in the big city. suren brought me to look for the office and after that we went for house hunting. finally, after looking aroung for a few hours, we decided that this apartment which is near to my new office is the most suitable and safe place for me. it has a security guard and most of the occupants are chinese university students. so on saturday, me, mum and adrian went to see the apartment and it was quite ok. i'm going to share a room with a chinese girl and she looks a little unfriendly. but my mission is to go there to work so i'll bear with it. i'm a little sad to leave my family here but i hope everything will be alright when i'm not here.

my new boss is ms rebecca ho and she's quite alright. currently she has only 1 staff but she's leaving end of the month. rebecca's actually looking for 2 staffs and she said she would be interviewing another person and i hope she hires another one. cos i don't wanna be alone there. she says that once i've gained the necessary experience, she might consider me as a junior partner. i'm glad to hear that. but my mission is to work there for about 3-4 years and then migrate to australia. my aussie dream is still very much alive. i hope this will be a good experience for me and everything will go on well.

this post is dedicated to my parents who were always there for me when i needed them and guide me through every step in my life. i promise to work hard for them to provide them with everything they need. also to suren who was kind enough to bring me all the way from kl to pj just to look for the office and houses. i love you all so much and i promise to give my all for this job.

my twisted and thorny durian life

2008-07-13T22:55:00.004+08:00

angel is so confused now. i need someone to guide me and tell me what to do. i'm going crazy. i don't know what to do. if i do it, will it be wrong and disrecpectful? i hope he can tell me what to do tmrw. i know we are not close now but i really need his opinion. i need the light at the end of the tunnel!!!

i need a sign

2008-07-12T18:44:00.003+08:00

angel is sick and tired of all the arguments and fights. please stop all these nonsense before i go crazy. think of me and boy. think of all the ups and downs you guys went through. is it all meaningless to you? you've been together for 26 years and you still behave like this. aren't you guys suppose to set a good example to me and boy? i'm going to do something drastic in the next few days and if it doesn't work then i don't know what else i can do. i hope i'm doing the right thing. i hope no one gets angry with me for the thing that i'm going to do after this. i just want everyone and everything to get back to the way it should be.

bitch & bastard

2008-06-17T02:01:00.008+08:00

today i'm going to blog about my eff-ing life during my college time. although it was the place where i met my baby, it was also one of the worst place on earth. there are a few people that i wanna trash and the reason why i'm doing this is to end it once and for all. after this, i'm not gonna feel sad or angry about anymore.

first up...the bitch...this is one girl which i do not recommend anyone to be friends with. girls, dont befriend her and guys, dont be fooled by her 'innocent' and 'crybaby' attitude. it's just to gain your sympathy. but thanks to her, i've learnt my lesson and am now more careful when making friends with other girls. dear bitch, thanks for trying to ruin my life and trying to steal my bf. thanks for all your shameless tears and lame gifts. thanks for getting me into hell when you tried to pair me up with that lame-o stalker. thanks for almost ruining my beloved cousin's life too. gosh, i didn't expect you to be bitchy towards my cousin when you were 12!!! do you think i wouldn't know anything about it? do you think i'm as stupid as you think? i hope someday someone would try to steal your bf (if you ever have one) and then you'll know my feelings. thanks for all the gifts you gave to my bf. somehow i just knew you are a perempuan gatal. i know all your schemes of trying to pair up with bf on THAT night just so you could show everyone that you are a match for him instead of me and trying to be nice and all towards him. oh yeah, thanks also for telling everyone lies about me. think i didnt know that hah... just be careful someday you'll get bitten in the ass and i will laugh at you non-stop, you silly-ass bitch.

secondly, is that bastard stalker. you stalked me for more than 2 years and you're lucky i didnt report you to the police (i almost did though). i think you're a creep and i hope i dont ever see you again. because of you, almost everyone blamed ME for your failure in the exams. because of you, most lecturers were on your fucking side instead of my side. because of you, i did not enjoy myself at both the kl trips and the pengkalan balak trip. because of you, a car scratched my mum's car. you basically ruined my life which was already destroyed by the bitch above. anyways, good luck in your life and please stay away from me. i will never ever lend you a helping hand if you ever need one. good riddance!!!

ok, after this i'm not going to speak of these 2 idiots anymore. i've poured out all my feelings and thats the end of it. i feel a lot better now. the moral of the story is be careful when choosing friends and know your limit. i learnt it the hard way and hopefully no one will go through what i've went through.

tengah betulkan his underwear...

2008-06-15T22:27:00.003+08:00

it's been a long time since my last post. well, many things happened. i quit my job in moi teik seng & partners after 2 months as i had to do lots of revision in may. exam was in june and it was ok. i hope i'll pass. i'm actually quite confident. mr damian asked me to work for him in his firm as a legal executive but i rejected it. eventhough he had long term plans for me, the salary was not what i had expected. i asked for rm1600 but guess how much he wanted to pay me....

rm750-rm850!!!

i was like....whattt...i almost vomit blood...it was wayyy to low lah cos i've to drive from bkt katil to mlk raya ok...petrol price already gone up so it's quite ridiculous lah to offer me that amount. some more he said yearly only increase 10%. how to survive lah... so i've already applied for a few jobs in kl lah. i have no choice but to go there lah eventhough i don't like kl. the prospect there is much better than melaka lah...also got more chance for growth... anyway hopefully i get the job that i want la.. i need a job with good pay la cos i'm already 24 years old...need to earn money for myself, for my family and for future la..

right now, i'm just relaxing la..adrian came back the other day. i was so happy to see him after such a long time but i didn't show my excitement la..malu lah..he has grown up a lot and i just hope he'll continue growing up into a fine young man. i just love him so much.

kareena and anjali-my 2 favourite kids

2008-03-17T18:29:00.005+08:00

i miss my primary school friends...

2008-03-14T18:12:00.003+08:00

i went for jogging in bkt serindit today...
i wasn't in the mood to jog. my whole body felt so weak.
then went to the shop and help out...
came back home at about 12 something and swept and mop the whole house.
and now here i am.
checking my mails and friendster.
and funny thing is that i've found my ex-primary schoolmates in friendster and the best part was that they still remember my full name. after all these years...about 12 years..it really made my day just to know that there are still some people in this world who still remember me. i miss them a lot...

i hope one day you'll be on my side...

2008-03-13T17:51:00.004+08:00

today was not a really fun day. i did some research in the morning but was quite bored. only in the afternoon my malay colleague gave me some work. and i noticed that maybe she gave me those work cos she thought she might not be able to finish it up on time. i felt a bit hurt as she only gave me work cos of that. i told my mum about it and as usual she blamed me. i wasn't complaining, i was just saying. they are great when i need help from them to teach me that's all. and she said that she noticed that i always complain about things wherever i work. no matter how much i say it, she just won't blame the other party and it is always my fault. and then she said the most hurtful thing to me...

"no wonder you don't have any friends..."
it was a stab in my heart. because i'm a bit sensitive when it comes to the subject of friends. she doesn't know how many times i've been betrayed by the people who used to be my "friends". she doesn't know all the threats i've received because i was being nice. she doesn't know that the reason why i berhati batu is because i really can't trust people anymore. people talk bad about me eventhough i've been nothing but nice to them. people think i'm a bad person just because i get mostly what i want. i've been backstabbed and lied to so many time and she doesn't know about all the hurt i've gone through because of friends. i don't wanna tell her all this. because i know she'll say it's my fault and that i deserve it. i hope one day she'll realise that no one is as perfect as her. and not everyone are able to be strong like her. my happy face is just a mask to cover up my sadness and sorrow. i won't take out this mask because i don't want her to blame me again.

from now on, i'll just do my work and be like a robot in the office. just follow everything they say and no need to be friends or try to be extra nice. i only want the experience, not to be nice and make friends there. from now on, this is what i'll do in every place i work. even if they talk shit about me, i'll just keep quiet and do my work and don't care about anything. i've already developed a thick skin because of all the bad experience since last time so i don't care! this is my life and i can do whatever i want. i don't need friends to make me feel good. i have 2 friends in my life (sara and andrea) and that's all. i don't need more friends. people nowadays are so fake and not trustworthy so it's better that i don't get myself into trouble. better be safe than sorry.

p/s: aikido pics will be posted up soon.

2008-03-11T18:33:00.002+08:00

i had more work to do today...first half of the day i was doing a little research.then after lunch time, boss gave me so many things to do. and i struggled a little cos everything was very new to me. i think i've to talk to my boss tomorrow to just let her know about this. so that she knows about my situation.

i had wan tan mee yesterday for lunch and noodle soup for today. and surprisingly, food there in melaka raya is good. and there are so many shops to choose from. i love that place. ooops...maybe not love lah... like only lah...cos i only love my boyfriend :D

i have nothing else to blog today except one little announcement...samy vellu lost his sungai siput seat to opposition party and anwar's daughter defeated shahrizat (si bodoh). yahoo and hurray to all!!!

bye...

a new day...

2008-03-10T19:34:00.004+08:00

i've started my new job today. i feel ok about it. it was 100 times better than klca. i think klca sucked and gave me a lot of problems. a lot of bullies there. the biggest bully was siew ping. siew ping, if you're reading this, i wish you all the best and i hope one day someone else will bully you and then you will know the feeling of being bullied! if i see you anywhere on the road needing help, I WON'T HELP YOU! anyway, back to my new found job, i like it there. one of my malay colleague is actually my classmate from primary school and she remembers me but i couldn't. there are 3 other chinese ladies and one of them is a little unfriendly. i think it was because i took her place and she was moved way back of the office. alone. anyway, she's a chambering student. today, my boss asked me what i wanna do in that firm. whether i wanna be a paralegal or just a normal legal clerk. so i told him i wanna be paralegal and he instantly gave me an assignment for me to do research on. in short, i'm comfortable working there. finally, my short term goal is achieved. and i'm moving up slowly. hopefully, my dream of working in australia will be fulfilled soon. maybe not so soon lah...hopefully in 6-7 years time...